8/9/06
The Nearness of Them

Tri-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions

by Herb Kandel



She never saw it coming. She was not expecting it and it came as a total surprise. There she was sitting quietly at the impressive round table where to her left and right were other leaders of nations. Then Germany's first female Chancellor, Angela Merkel, started speaking with Italian Prime Minister Romano Prodi at the G-8 Summit near St. Petersburg a few weeks ago when President George W. Bush approaches Merkel from behind and gives her a squeeze on her shoulders and then a slight flexing massage maneuver. The video of it was widely shown on TV and numerous web sites. It then shows Merkel hunching her shoulders and flinging her arms up in a gesture to stop the impromptu massage. Her expression is one of “Can this really be happening?”

Not seeking the guise of a political pundit there is no need to delve into the worldwide ramifications of this “laying on of hands” incident as to how it played out in other countries but let’s take a look at where boundaries lie both here and elsewhere.

The study of this measureable distances interaction between people is called proxemics and was introduced by anthropologist Edward T, Hall in 1963. These relate to body spacing and posture that are unintentional (the body language). According to Wikipedia

“Hall pointed out that social distance between people is reliably correlated with physical distance, and described four distances:

intimate distance for embracing, touching or whispering ( 6-18 inches)

personal distance for interactions among good friends ( 1.5-4 feet)

social distance for interactions among acquaintances ( 4-12 ft)

public distance used for public speaking (over 12 ft) “

We human beings are territorial animals and like to protect and control our space, as do other animal species. Remember the time you re-entered a class or meeting and found someone sitting in “your” seat? You’re sitting at your desk when a co-worker or boss enters your office without knocking ….how do you feel? And what if you saw your co-worker checking out your desk drawer?

When our space is “invaded” by people who are not aware of these zones and the meanings attached to them the result is tension and suspicion. You’re in an elevator, bus, or movie theater when the stranger at your side inadvertently touches you. Wham! Your own bubble of space has been invaded and you begin to feel uncomfortable, possibly resentful, perhaps belligerent, maybe even challenged. But if you were in a another part of the world personal zones are viewed differently. Different cultures = different distance zones. Whereas we in the U.S., Northern Europeans, and Asians favor the Social Zone (about 4 feet) and little physical contact, Arab, Latin, and Mediterranean cultures are more the “in your face” Intimate and Personal Zone people. Recall when President Bush and Crown Prince Abdullah held hands walking into their meeting in Texas after their greeting with cheek kisses? These actions prompted questions and raised eyebrows about two men showing that kind of physical intimacy but White House sources quickly explained “hand-holding is an Arab expression of ‘friendship, respect and trust.’” These were also political gestures, to perhaps become more ingratiating to the visitor and allow the oil to continue to flow. On the other hand there have been many “ugly American” stereotypes as we were considered “aloof” and “stand-offish” as we backed away from those with whom we were conversing as they attempted to decrease the distance between.

So maybe the president was merely attempting to show more camaraderie, playfulness, and commonality in a more “touching” manner, but almost any thinking male today knows he may be inviting a sexual harassment suit by giving an uninvited massage to any female in our culture. And it has been noted by others that the president should keep in mind that the G-8 Summit is not to be mistaken for Yale’s Delta Kappa Epsilon.