3/28/07
Symbiosis for everyone
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
What to do? The problem Germany now faces is a fast aging population, the estimate in 2050 is one third of the population will be over 65 and close to ¾ of a million people will require some type of assisted living plus the facilities in which to accommodate them. Even with a high unemployment rate the openings for elder-care remain unanswered. Some relief was had in the mixing of the elderly with youth centers, vocational schools, and even tapping young men to work there in lieu of their mandatory military hitch. Still the demand exceeds supply so to help fill this gap a fresh solution is being explored now - retraining prostitutes for these positions. Since it was legalized there has been intense competition in the oldest profession and an abundance of ‘vendors’. Too much of that ‘supply’ coupled with no retirement or health plans led to more idle ladies of the night. That’s when someone saw the light…..the red one.
According to “US News & World Report” a pilot program to do just that has been started. The program has about 50 in it and according to the program director, "Prostitutes have already learned to get along with people, and they're usually very good listeners. Plus, they have no reservations about touching people's bodies." Another peripheral benefit was ….but I‘ll get to that later.
This type of relationship is similar to mutuality in symbiosis. That is when two or more species live and interact closely wherein both benefit. For example, the clown fish and the anemone where the fish feeds the poisonous anemone, the anemone protects the fish. Another is the tickbirds and the rhinoceros where the birds get dinner, a free ride, and protection and the rhinos get a companion who picks ticks off its back.
That relationship of contributing and receiving got me to thinking of other occasions where mutuality could be applied, both practical and theoretical, and realistic and whimsical. But instead of different species let's consider only human inter-relationships.
Remember Yenta the matchmaker in “Fiddler on the Roof” saying, “ With the way she looks and the way he sees, it’s a perfect match.”? In the movie “See No Evil, Hear No Evil” Gene Wilder is deaf, and Richard Pryor is blind. They witness a murder, Gene saw it and Richard heard it but they had to combine their senses to save themselves from the killers attempts to stop them from testifying.
When a German bar installed in the urinals little cogwheels that start to rotate once you ‘hit’ them they found that not only were the toilets more hygienic but they saved money on cleaning, all by giving their customers amusement utilizing a bodily function. Some have even built in LEDs to produce a lightshow with sounds. Tell me that’s not an inducement to belly up to the bar to drink more beer! Free enterprise symbiosis par excellence.
Tom Sawyer got his fence whitewashed by his friends (and made them pay for the ‘privilege’) when he got them believing that the chore was a fun task that few could do. Wrote Mark Twain, “He had discovered a great law of human action, without knowing it -- namely, that in order to make a man or a boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain“. Both parties got what they wanted but Tom got the ‘mostest’.
Consider the carpenter aiding the orthopedist in the placement of those artificial joints and limbs. Imagine elbow hinges with spring-like attachments that could absorb the impacts of making continual smashes without fear of getting tennis elbow. Or a cervical implant preventing head movement when putting on the golf course.
How about an artist linking with the IRS form writer? This would take some of the pain out while filling in a 1040 if it had a little color combined with icons, arrows, marginal hints, and a smiley face on the ‘Amount to be refunded’ line.
A chef working hand in hand with a cabinet maker and architect can save the home cook many steps, and food drippings, by the most efficient placement of appliance space, shelves, drawers, hooks, vents, etc.. Now, there’s thought for food!
What if your local cable and telephone provider charges were deducted from your pay check? And what if that payment was delayed, or credited, for the same amount of time spent trying to get them on the phone plus when the repair is made, every time there is an outage or dropped call?
Mutuality may not be the uppermost thought as we go about our living but we practice it several times a day…..every time we wash our hands.
Getting back to the lead example above: as an additional benefit that may accrue by having the former prostitutes aid the elderly in assisted living facilities - expenses in Viagra purchases should be substantially reduced.
END
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
3/14/07
I’m ready for my close-up, boss
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
There was a time in America when all an employer had to do to hire an employee was to put a "HELP WANTED" sign visible on the street. In Boston in the mid 1800’s the first known private employment agency was established. They were crude by contemporary standards. They consisted of merely listing available labor and making these lists available to the employer. A small fee was charged to the applicant for registering and a larger fee if a job was accepted. Most jobs were in the blue-collar category. It was during World War I that employment agencies aided the government by finding, screening, and testing. The filing system was improved which led to placing people in government and in war plants. After the war, agencies did a remarkable job in relocating personnel into peacetime positions. During the Depression the government set up a network of tax supported employment agencies primarily for semi-skilled and unskilled workers while most employers still used private employment agencies for skilled, white-collar, and technical personnel. Most private agencies were applicant paid until the mid 1970’s when the employer paid fees started attracting the applicants who felt that their talents and skills were part of the employers obligations.
The main tool to open the door when applying for a new job had been the résumé. The one or two page sheet listing objective, education, experience, and qualifications. Statistically for every 200 résumé's received by the average employer only one interview is granted. The résumé that took days to get ‘just right’ will be quickly scanned, rather than read, and evaluated in ten to 20 seconds. If the first impression fails to impress a prospective employer to read further, it goes into the circular file.
Fast forward to the age of the Internet. The ink on paper is being replaced by the pixel on the screen. For the past 15 years job seekers have been posting their résumés on numerous Internet sites. The latest tweak is the video résumé, or as I call it, the vidomé. Go to You Tube, there you can view two to five minute uploaded vidomés from candidates seeking interviews, over 1500 of them. There are other sites that feature potential workplaces and another that uses webcams to pose real-time interview questions to candidates ( they prep the candidate, i.e., be well groomed, dress appropriately, do not chew gum or smoke).
In ‘the old days’ (pre-pixels) companies and recruiters would not accept résumés that had photos attached because of potential law suits. Many résumés that were submitted omitted the persons name by substituting a numeric ID, citing instances that bias might be shown by favoring certain racial sounding names.
Human resources departments are now in a quandary. Will viewing a vidomé invite a lawsuit by the videoed candidate who feels they were disqualified because of age, race, disability, or gender? Another wrinkle is that paper and typing words on it is available to everyone, not so the computer and web cam, and this may open the door for additional litigation .
As more and more applicants utilize this mode of presentation the more sophisticated they will become and the candidate who gets the in-person interview may not be the most qualified but the one who has a touch of a Steven Spielberg. A vidomé may have poor lighting or is unsteady which is the equivalent of having a typo on the printed résumé. A recent survey listed the responses from 150 senior executives at the nation’s 1,000 largest companies. Executives were asked "How many typos in a résumé does it take for you to decide not to consider a job candidate for a position with your company?" Their responses: one typo, 47 percent; two typos, 37 percent; four or more typos, 6 percent; and no answer, 3 percent. So extreme attention to detail is a must for all job seekers.
In the long run it will be the employers who will determine if vidomés are a viable avenue for the job seeker. Time to review any form of solicitation being a major factor. It is a rare human resource person who will spent five minutes studying a single video when he/she could have evaluated 15 to 20 in that same time. Though the vidomé is a small current fad I believe paper over pixel will win just like paper over rock. And have you noticed a complete turn-around to the ‘old days’ with billboards and window signs almost pleading "NOW HIRING"? Who knows, the next innovative form may be a return to sandwich signs.
END
I’m ready for my close-up, boss
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
There was a time in America when all an employer had to do to hire an employee was to put a "HELP WANTED" sign visible on the street. In Boston in the mid 1800’s the first known private employment agency was established. They were crude by contemporary standards. They consisted of merely listing available labor and making these lists available to the employer. A small fee was charged to the applicant for registering and a larger fee if a job was accepted. Most jobs were in the blue-collar category. It was during World War I that employment agencies aided the government by finding, screening, and testing. The filing system was improved which led to placing people in government and in war plants. After the war, agencies did a remarkable job in relocating personnel into peacetime positions. During the Depression the government set up a network of tax supported employment agencies primarily for semi-skilled and unskilled workers while most employers still used private employment agencies for skilled, white-collar, and technical personnel. Most private agencies were applicant paid until the mid 1970’s when the employer paid fees started attracting the applicants who felt that their talents and skills were part of the employers obligations.
The main tool to open the door when applying for a new job had been the résumé. The one or two page sheet listing objective, education, experience, and qualifications. Statistically for every 200 résumé's received by the average employer only one interview is granted. The résumé that took days to get ‘just right’ will be quickly scanned, rather than read, and evaluated in ten to 20 seconds. If the first impression fails to impress a prospective employer to read further, it goes into the circular file.
Fast forward to the age of the Internet. The ink on paper is being replaced by the pixel on the screen. For the past 15 years job seekers have been posting their résumés on numerous Internet sites. The latest tweak is the video résumé, or as I call it, the vidomé. Go to You Tube, there you can view two to five minute uploaded vidomés from candidates seeking interviews, over 1500 of them. There are other sites that feature potential workplaces and another that uses webcams to pose real-time interview questions to candidates ( they prep the candidate, i.e., be well groomed, dress appropriately, do not chew gum or smoke).
In ‘the old days’ (pre-pixels) companies and recruiters would not accept résumés that had photos attached because of potential law suits. Many résumés that were submitted omitted the persons name by substituting a numeric ID, citing instances that bias might be shown by favoring certain racial sounding names.
Human resources departments are now in a quandary. Will viewing a vidomé invite a lawsuit by the videoed candidate who feels they were disqualified because of age, race, disability, or gender? Another wrinkle is that paper and typing words on it is available to everyone, not so the computer and web cam, and this may open the door for additional litigation .
As more and more applicants utilize this mode of presentation the more sophisticated they will become and the candidate who gets the in-person interview may not be the most qualified but the one who has a touch of a Steven Spielberg. A vidomé may have poor lighting or is unsteady which is the equivalent of having a typo on the printed résumé. A recent survey listed the responses from 150 senior executives at the nation’s 1,000 largest companies. Executives were asked "How many typos in a résumé does it take for you to decide not to consider a job candidate for a position with your company?" Their responses: one typo, 47 percent; two typos, 37 percent; four or more typos, 6 percent; and no answer, 3 percent. So extreme attention to detail is a must for all job seekers.
In the long run it will be the employers who will determine if vidomés are a viable avenue for the job seeker. Time to review any form of solicitation being a major factor. It is a rare human resource person who will spent five minutes studying a single video when he/she could have evaluated 15 to 20 in that same time. Though the vidomé is a small current fad I believe paper over pixel will win just like paper over rock. And have you noticed a complete turn-around to the ‘old days’ with billboards and window signs almost pleading "NOW HIRING"? Who knows, the next innovative form may be a return to sandwich signs.
END
Thursday, March 01, 2007
2/28/07
Of pride and presidents
Tri-O's
Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
Last week was Presidents Day, the third Monday of February. George Washington’s Birthday is February 22 and Abraham Lincoln’s is the 12th. The original intent of the federal holiday was to honor both Washington and Lincoln, but when signed into law in 1968 only Washington's Birthday was moved and old Abe was left dateless, honestly. Some states have renamed the day "Washington and Lincoln Day" but here in Alabama, since 2002, the third Monday in February commemorates the birthdays of both George Washington and Thomas Jefferson (who was born on April 13). So ‘goodbye’ Abe and ‘hello’ Tom. This is not to be viewed as a slight to our visiting snowbirds but more of defining the state motto: Audemus jura nostra defendere (We Dare Defend Our Rights), or so it seems.
Also in keeping with a presidents theme U.S. News & World Report in their Februarys.26th edition had a cover story on “America’s worst presidents”. For its’ list (excluding the current commander-in-chief), they “used the bottom 10 rankings on five major scholarly polls”. The least effective is James Buchanan, followed in order by Warren G. Harding, Andrew Johnson, Franklin Pierce, Millard Fillmore, John Tyler, Ulysses S. Grant, William Harrison, Herbert Hoover tied with Richard Nixon, and Zachary Taylor. How would you like to see their faces chiseled on the peaks of ole Rocky Top?
The general consensus of the scholars in their assessment of the presidential malfunctioners “was passivity or inaction in the face of great historical challenges” or if their activism was considered “misplaced“. What is called for is a delicate balance of appropriate actions then act decisively, otherwise it’s “Damned if I do and damned if I don't”. I'll have to run that thought by Homer Simpson.
Though the presidential election is over a year and a half away there are so many hats in the ring already it looks like a milliner convention. Some of the contenders have common names, I.e., Joe (Biden), John (Edwards and McCain), and Jim (Gilmore) and some not so usual, I.e., Barack (Obama), Newt (Gingrich), Duncan (Hunter), Mitt (Romney), Hillary (Clinton). And if Tim Smucker, Chairman and Co-CEO of Smucker’s became a candidate a shoe-in combination name would be Duncan Obama Mitt Smucker which sounds like a German dessert with fruit topping and with a name like that he'll have to be good.
If you thought the recent political ads were negative and nasty they don't hold a hanging Chad to what went on in the presidential campaign of 1800 and its aftermath. When Jefferson was Vice-president he paid, via an employee, to James Callender, a newspaper writer, to publish that President John Adams was loyal to the English crown and a pawn to British interests. Jefferson could not do it himself for it would violate the Sedition Act of 1798, which was aimed at crushing freedom of speech and repressing political opposition. Adams countered that if Jefferson were elected president, Americans would "see your dwellings in flames" and "female chastity violated."
Callender was convicted and jailed. After the election he was pardoned by Jefferson but when he was denied the job of a postmaster he printed that Jefferson had "for many years past kept, as his concubine, one of his own slaves," Sally Hemings. Learning of this, Abigail Adams, wife of the maligned former President Adams, wrote Jefferson “the serpent you cherished and warmed, bit the hand that nourished him.”
According to American Heritage , “By modern standards Jefferson’s active role in promoting anti-Adams propaganda and his complicity in leaking information …… were impeachable offenses that verged on treason.”
Callender also publicized an affair that Treasurer Secretary Alexander Hamilton had with the wife of a Treasury clerk and that Hamilton was being investigated about shady financial dealings. He was one of the first to argue that the public had the right to know the moral character of those elected.
Hamilton admitted to the affair but nothing else. He later became the intervening force on Jefferson's behalf when Jefferson tied with Aaron Burr for the presidency. At that time the candidate receiving the greatest number of electoral votes would become president The person receiving the second-highest number would become vice president. Not a fan of Jefferson, Hamilton thought him the lesser of two evils. The escalated animosity between Hamilton and Burr ended in a duel; Hamilton shot his pistol into the air and Burr lodged his bullet in Hamilton’s midsection inflicting a mortal wound.
The lady, Maria Reynolds, Hamilton’s paramour, is a figure that weaves enigmatically among some of the named people. When Callender was to testify in a libel suit he was suspiciously found drowned in three feet of water. Ironically it was Hamilton as defense attorney who had summoned Callender and it was Maria who submitted Jefferson’s letters to Callender.
For a full version of theses presidential pranks read William Safire’s novelization of all the facts in Scandalmonger.
END
Of pride and presidents
Tri-O's
Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
Last week was Presidents Day, the third Monday of February. George Washington’s Birthday is February 22 and Abraham Lincoln’s is the 12th. The original intent of the federal holiday was to honor both Washington and Lincoln, but when signed into law in 1968 only Washington's Birthday was moved and old Abe was left dateless, honestly. Some states have renamed the day "Washington and Lincoln Day" but here in Alabama, since 2002, the third Monday in February commemorates the birthdays of both George Washington and Thomas Jefferson (who was born on April 13). So ‘goodbye’ Abe and ‘hello’ Tom. This is not to be viewed as a slight to our visiting snowbirds but more of defining the state motto: Audemus jura nostra defendere (We Dare Defend Our Rights), or so it seems.
Also in keeping with a presidents theme U.S. News & World Report in their Februarys.26th edition had a cover story on “America’s worst presidents”. For its’ list (excluding the current commander-in-chief), they “used the bottom 10 rankings on five major scholarly polls”. The least effective is James Buchanan, followed in order by Warren G. Harding, Andrew Johnson, Franklin Pierce, Millard Fillmore, John Tyler, Ulysses S. Grant, William Harrison, Herbert Hoover tied with Richard Nixon, and Zachary Taylor. How would you like to see their faces chiseled on the peaks of ole Rocky Top?
The general consensus of the scholars in their assessment of the presidential malfunctioners “was passivity or inaction in the face of great historical challenges” or if their activism was considered “misplaced“. What is called for is a delicate balance of appropriate actions then act decisively, otherwise it’s “Damned if I do and damned if I don't”. I'll have to run that thought by Homer Simpson.
Though the presidential election is over a year and a half away there are so many hats in the ring already it looks like a milliner convention. Some of the contenders have common names, I.e., Joe (Biden), John (Edwards and McCain), and Jim (Gilmore) and some not so usual, I.e., Barack (Obama), Newt (Gingrich), Duncan (Hunter), Mitt (Romney), Hillary (Clinton). And if Tim Smucker, Chairman and Co-CEO of Smucker’s became a candidate a shoe-in combination name would be Duncan Obama Mitt Smucker which sounds like a German dessert with fruit topping and with a name like that he'll have to be good.
If you thought the recent political ads were negative and nasty they don't hold a hanging Chad to what went on in the presidential campaign of 1800 and its aftermath. When Jefferson was Vice-president he paid, via an employee, to James Callender, a newspaper writer, to publish that President John Adams was loyal to the English crown and a pawn to British interests. Jefferson could not do it himself for it would violate the Sedition Act of 1798, which was aimed at crushing freedom of speech and repressing political opposition. Adams countered that if Jefferson were elected president, Americans would "see your dwellings in flames" and "female chastity violated."
Callender was convicted and jailed. After the election he was pardoned by Jefferson but when he was denied the job of a postmaster he printed that Jefferson had "for many years past kept, as his concubine, one of his own slaves," Sally Hemings. Learning of this, Abigail Adams, wife of the maligned former President Adams, wrote Jefferson “the serpent you cherished and warmed, bit the hand that nourished him.”
According to American Heritage , “By modern standards Jefferson’s active role in promoting anti-Adams propaganda and his complicity in leaking information …… were impeachable offenses that verged on treason.”
Callender also publicized an affair that Treasurer Secretary Alexander Hamilton had with the wife of a Treasury clerk and that Hamilton was being investigated about shady financial dealings. He was one of the first to argue that the public had the right to know the moral character of those elected.
Hamilton admitted to the affair but nothing else. He later became the intervening force on Jefferson's behalf when Jefferson tied with Aaron Burr for the presidency. At that time the candidate receiving the greatest number of electoral votes would become president The person receiving the second-highest number would become vice president. Not a fan of Jefferson, Hamilton thought him the lesser of two evils. The escalated animosity between Hamilton and Burr ended in a duel; Hamilton shot his pistol into the air and Burr lodged his bullet in Hamilton’s midsection inflicting a mortal wound.
The lady, Maria Reynolds, Hamilton’s paramour, is a figure that weaves enigmatically among some of the named people. When Callender was to testify in a libel suit he was suspiciously found drowned in three feet of water. Ironically it was Hamilton as defense attorney who had summoned Callender and it was Maria who submitted Jefferson’s letters to Callender.
For a full version of theses presidential pranks read William Safire’s novelization of all the facts in Scandalmonger.
END
Thursday, February 15, 2007
2/14/07
Heart-felt V-Day tales
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
V for Verity (your choice)
Here we are again on this day of hearts and flowers in celebration of St. Valentine. Inquiring minds may ask: who was this person and why does this day inspire approximately 188 million cards to be exchanged (not counting kids’ classroom card swapping), making Valentine’s Day the second largest date for giving greeting cards along with helping the U.S. Postal Service (as almost 50% are hand delivered)?
One legend has it that Valentine was a priest in third century Rome when Emperor Claudius II ruled. Claudius reasoned that single men fought harder in combat than those with wives and families, so he outlawed marriage for young men. One would assume that the brides-to-be were hopping mad, to say nothing of the caterers, and so was Valentine, who, to defy this injustice, continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When his actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.
Another version has Valentine killed for attempting to help Christians escape barbaric Roman prisons where they were treated harshly. He wanted to exchange the lash with love.
Yet a different account has Valentine sending the first 'valentine' greeting himself. It was said that Valentine, while in prison, fell in love with the young girl (speculation has it that it was the jailor's daughter) who visited him during his confinement. His final letter to her, before he was dispatched to meet his fellow saints, was signed 'From your Valentine'
Take your choice but the occasion accentuates his charismatic personality as a compassionate, gallant, and romantic figure. So when you present or are the recipient of sweets, flowers, and other gifts remember to be thankful for St. Val …but no matter how appreciative you may be, it will not come close to those of Mr. Hallmarks’.
V for Valor
Apropos to this red letter day there is this touching story of two kindred souls who were born in the same town just a few miles apart. One grew up in a family that spared no expense when it came to his well being and toys. The other had a meager start in life and she learned to make do with what was presented her. They first met in a park when they were young. As they romped about, a bond was established unbeknown to them. Time passed, he went to school, learned a lot, then put all this training to work; whereas she was home schooled, very protected and sheltered. Although they lived only several miles apart they did not meet again until years later.
It was at a medical facility. He was there to get his shots when she strolled in for a check-up. They first gazed at each other and recognition dawned slowly. Ted remembered where they had met but it took Sara a little longer. Much time had passed since they had last been together and neither wanted that to happen again. Each hoped that they would get the opportunity to meet soon again. Destiny was to play a hand as you will see.
Ted was doing work for the police department, and she was a domestic.
One chilly afternoon there was a terrible explosion in the part of town where Sara lived. A gas line had ruptured, a spark from an electric motor ignited it. Several homes caught the brunt. They were quickly reduced to rubble. The fire fighters and police emergency units were called. The fire was put out in short order but beneath the debris some residents were trapped. Moans and cries for help were given swift attention.
After several hours it all the people known to have been living in the area were accounted for. Everyone except Sara.
The police unit was there going over the devastation, Ted among them. Hopes were getting slimmer by the minute. The cold was giving way to sleet making the search for survivors even more treacherous. They were about to call a halt but Ted persisted in his exploring every inch of the area despite fatigue and deteriorating weather.
It was he who heard that ever so feeble cry from an exhausted throat. Ted started digging with an intensity not witnessed before . Others seeing his desperation quickly started to help him. The sounds were now more distinct as the house innards were peeled away. In a few moments Sara was seen then lifted out of the place where she had been trapped. She looked over her shoulder saw Ted. She knew instinctively that it was he who had found her. In a wail like tone, with an intense stare she bellowed “ ME OWW” . Those there swear it sounded like “Thank you”. Meanwhile Ted just pawed the ground in a John Wayne stance.
Ted was awarded K-9 of the Year on Valentine’s Day. Sara was in attendance.
Note to my BH (Better Half)--Happy Valentine’s Day
END
Heart-felt V-Day tales
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
V for Verity (your choice)
Here we are again on this day of hearts and flowers in celebration of St. Valentine. Inquiring minds may ask: who was this person and why does this day inspire approximately 188 million cards to be exchanged (not counting kids’ classroom card swapping), making Valentine’s Day the second largest date for giving greeting cards along with helping the U.S. Postal Service (as almost 50% are hand delivered)?
One legend has it that Valentine was a priest in third century Rome when Emperor Claudius II ruled. Claudius reasoned that single men fought harder in combat than those with wives and families, so he outlawed marriage for young men. One would assume that the brides-to-be were hopping mad, to say nothing of the caterers, and so was Valentine, who, to defy this injustice, continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When his actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.
Another version has Valentine killed for attempting to help Christians escape barbaric Roman prisons where they were treated harshly. He wanted to exchange the lash with love.
Yet a different account has Valentine sending the first 'valentine' greeting himself. It was said that Valentine, while in prison, fell in love with the young girl (speculation has it that it was the jailor's daughter) who visited him during his confinement. His final letter to her, before he was dispatched to meet his fellow saints, was signed 'From your Valentine'
Take your choice but the occasion accentuates his charismatic personality as a compassionate, gallant, and romantic figure. So when you present or are the recipient of sweets, flowers, and other gifts remember to be thankful for St. Val …but no matter how appreciative you may be, it will not come close to those of Mr. Hallmarks’.
V for Valor
Apropos to this red letter day there is this touching story of two kindred souls who were born in the same town just a few miles apart. One grew up in a family that spared no expense when it came to his well being and toys. The other had a meager start in life and she learned to make do with what was presented her. They first met in a park when they were young. As they romped about, a bond was established unbeknown to them. Time passed, he went to school, learned a lot, then put all this training to work; whereas she was home schooled, very protected and sheltered. Although they lived only several miles apart they did not meet again until years later.
It was at a medical facility. He was there to get his shots when she strolled in for a check-up. They first gazed at each other and recognition dawned slowly. Ted remembered where they had met but it took Sara a little longer. Much time had passed since they had last been together and neither wanted that to happen again. Each hoped that they would get the opportunity to meet soon again. Destiny was to play a hand as you will see.
Ted was doing work for the police department, and she was a domestic.
One chilly afternoon there was a terrible explosion in the part of town where Sara lived. A gas line had ruptured, a spark from an electric motor ignited it. Several homes caught the brunt. They were quickly reduced to rubble. The fire fighters and police emergency units were called. The fire was put out in short order but beneath the debris some residents were trapped. Moans and cries for help were given swift attention.
After several hours it all the people known to have been living in the area were accounted for. Everyone except Sara.
The police unit was there going over the devastation, Ted among them. Hopes were getting slimmer by the minute. The cold was giving way to sleet making the search for survivors even more treacherous. They were about to call a halt but Ted persisted in his exploring every inch of the area despite fatigue and deteriorating weather.
It was he who heard that ever so feeble cry from an exhausted throat. Ted started digging with an intensity not witnessed before . Others seeing his desperation quickly started to help him. The sounds were now more distinct as the house innards were peeled away. In a few moments Sara was seen then lifted out of the place where she had been trapped. She looked over her shoulder saw Ted. She knew instinctively that it was he who had found her. In a wail like tone, with an intense stare she bellowed “ ME OWW” . Those there swear it sounded like “Thank you”. Meanwhile Ted just pawed the ground in a John Wayne stance.
Ted was awarded K-9 of the Year on Valentine’s Day. Sara was in attendance.
Note to my BH (Better Half)--Happy Valentine’s Day
END
Sunday, February 04, 2007
1/31/07
Déjà vu, times two
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
Some see the world in a crystal ball, others in tea leaves or tarot cards. I recently felt immersed in a similar situation but mine happened over a plastic encased menu. The realization that I was part of the scenario came to me slowly as I observed and later became aware of what was taking place in my immediate surroundings. It happened last week as I sat alone in a restaurant , a notch above the fast food variety, having lunch after concluding some personal business in Pensacola. My seat faced the entrance where incoming diners waited to be seated, to the right was the cash register where exiting customers paid their dining bill. From this vantage point comings and goings became a passing parade.
The entire scene was evolving into something familiar but I could not put my finger on it at the time. Let me tell you what was happening within this limited sphere of my booth and you'll better understand this seeming déjà vu.
Waiting for the hostess to seat them was a young couple with an infant, the sleeping child was Oriental, not so the assumed parents. Behind them were three teen-age girls giggling over something. Making their way haltingly to the register was an elderly man and woman, both pushed walkers in front of them and each was accompanied by a caregiver whom I later saw assist them into a car. There at table to my left were grandparents discussing, in elevated voices of the hard of hearing, what to give their grandchild for her birthday as they sipped their milkshakes. A very obviously pregnant woman was trying to get the attention of a server, she wanted additional pickles for her sandwich. Waiting in the register line were three men in hard hats each a different ethnicity. The servers were mostly college students who zipped between tables with the energy that is only in my memory. The couple with the infant was shown to a table that a young man and woman just vacated, these two were holding hands and smiling at each other as they lined up behind the hard hats.
The whole scene to me became a microcosm of Life itself. Here was the whole gamut, the entire cycle surrounding me, with the exception of it’s conception and demise.
Where had I experienced this feeling before? The file cabinet of memory slowly opened to reveal two instances where the person becomes the spectator, removed from the actual events but absorbing the ambiance.
One was in the work of Christopher Isherwood who wrote “The Berlin Stories” which was made into a play in 1951 and a film in 1955 called “I Am A Camera” and later into the 1972 musical “Cabaret”. In it Isherwood says, “I am a camera with its shutter open, quite passive, recording, not thinking.” He gave us a snapshot of a time and place. Although his ‘camera’ focused on Berlin in the early 1930’s the sight from my viewfinder, by comparison, was indeed more prosaic because of setting and circumstance.
The second reminder was from a 1948 movie adapted from a Pulitzer prize play by William Saroyan, “The Time of Your Life”. In it the main character (played by James Cagney) sits in a dilapidated bar and observes the colorful patrons in their eccentricities. Cagney was not only was a observer but also a participant in the happenings which changed the course of the characters lives, whereas mine was strictly a benign awareness of the proximate life stages.
There was a keen sense of discovery and awe as a witness to the sequence of human transience, here, alone. “The world may be your oyster” to paraphrase the old idiom but my revelation came while waiting for a cheeseburger, fries, and hold the onion.
END
Déjà vu, times two
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
Some see the world in a crystal ball, others in tea leaves or tarot cards. I recently felt immersed in a similar situation but mine happened over a plastic encased menu. The realization that I was part of the scenario came to me slowly as I observed and later became aware of what was taking place in my immediate surroundings. It happened last week as I sat alone in a restaurant , a notch above the fast food variety, having lunch after concluding some personal business in Pensacola. My seat faced the entrance where incoming diners waited to be seated, to the right was the cash register where exiting customers paid their dining bill. From this vantage point comings and goings became a passing parade.
The entire scene was evolving into something familiar but I could not put my finger on it at the time. Let me tell you what was happening within this limited sphere of my booth and you'll better understand this seeming déjà vu.
Waiting for the hostess to seat them was a young couple with an infant, the sleeping child was Oriental, not so the assumed parents. Behind them were three teen-age girls giggling over something. Making their way haltingly to the register was an elderly man and woman, both pushed walkers in front of them and each was accompanied by a caregiver whom I later saw assist them into a car. There at table to my left were grandparents discussing, in elevated voices of the hard of hearing, what to give their grandchild for her birthday as they sipped their milkshakes. A very obviously pregnant woman was trying to get the attention of a server, she wanted additional pickles for her sandwich. Waiting in the register line were three men in hard hats each a different ethnicity. The servers were mostly college students who zipped between tables with the energy that is only in my memory. The couple with the infant was shown to a table that a young man and woman just vacated, these two were holding hands and smiling at each other as they lined up behind the hard hats.
The whole scene to me became a microcosm of Life itself. Here was the whole gamut, the entire cycle surrounding me, with the exception of it’s conception and demise.
Where had I experienced this feeling before? The file cabinet of memory slowly opened to reveal two instances where the person becomes the spectator, removed from the actual events but absorbing the ambiance.
One was in the work of Christopher Isherwood who wrote “The Berlin Stories” which was made into a play in 1951 and a film in 1955 called “I Am A Camera” and later into the 1972 musical “Cabaret”. In it Isherwood says, “I am a camera with its shutter open, quite passive, recording, not thinking.” He gave us a snapshot of a time and place. Although his ‘camera’ focused on Berlin in the early 1930’s the sight from my viewfinder, by comparison, was indeed more prosaic because of setting and circumstance.
The second reminder was from a 1948 movie adapted from a Pulitzer prize play by William Saroyan, “The Time of Your Life”. In it the main character (played by James Cagney) sits in a dilapidated bar and observes the colorful patrons in their eccentricities. Cagney was not only was a observer but also a participant in the happenings which changed the course of the characters lives, whereas mine was strictly a benign awareness of the proximate life stages.
There was a keen sense of discovery and awe as a witness to the sequence of human transience, here, alone. “The world may be your oyster” to paraphrase the old idiom but my revelation came while waiting for a cheeseburger, fries, and hold the onion.
END
Friday, January 19, 2007
1/17/07
Baby, it's cold outside - or is it?
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
Baby, it's cold outside - or is it?
When Johnny Carson hosted the Tonight Show he sometimes mentioned the weather in Los Angeles when it was unusual. He would start with , “It was very cold in L.A. today….” And before he continued the audience would shout out as one voice, “HOW COLD WAS IT?” Then Johnny would answer, "It was so cold today, a cab driver was saying something to a pedestrian and his middle finger froze."
I was reminded of this recently when my wife was complaining about the “freezing” weather and also something about having to walk the dogs, the combination of which leads to happy frisky walkees and an irritated chilled walker. And this was with temps in the mid 40’s!
“When I was a kid we would consider weather like this to be tropical. And what‘s more in the really frigid times we used to go fishing”, I said. “Sure”, she demurred with the hint of a smirk. “It’s true. Let me tell you.” And I continued:
It’s the dead of winter, bundled against cold and sometimes whipping cold weather wearing at least two of everything , what was later called “layering”, ……underwear, pants, sweaters socks, hats that rolled down to cover our ears,…..Sy and I went frost fishing. We were about 12 or 13. For this “fishing” all you needed was a burlap sack, papa’s boots stuffed with newspaper both for isolation and to fill the space for our smaller feet , and gloves (those brown cotton ones, we wore 2 pair of them also) that usually got soaked in short order. We would walk along the shore line on the Rockaway Beach peninsula in New York and pick up the “frost” fish ( I learned later they are called whitings or silver hake) which had been tossed onto the beach by the surf . They would be flash frozen. Most were stiff but many were still wriggling trying to get back to the ocean on the next wave when we picked them up. The moon reflected off their silver bellies and it was a beautiful sight to see the flashing shimmering light of this manna from the sea - almost like the brilliance of fireflies on summer nights. On moonless nights we used flash lights to reveal the silver of the beached fish. We had to time it so that we had a full 40 -50 lb. sack when we returned to our starting point. When there were other frost fishers on the shore it was a competition to see who got to the fish first. If I concentrate I can still feel the sting of frigid air with each inhalation and see the heavy smoke on exhale.
After we lugged our bounty home our mothers’ cleaned what our family was to eat, there were no freezers at that time (in fact a wooden crate from the “fruit store”, with a shelf in the center that formerly held oranges, was nailed to the outside of the kitchen window and freezing temperatures would keep frozen whatever was put in it during the cold months). The ice box was just that. The majority of the fish we sold by going door to door in the neighborhood for 5 cents, and 10 cents for the larger ones. We always liked to go fishing Thursday night so we could sell the fish to our Catholic neighbors for their Friday suppers. Many depended on us for those fresh beauties and the affordable price.
During the war years, WW2, the beach was patrolled by the Coast Guard so that no spy could signal Nazi U-boats which were thought to be off the Atlantic coast. Naturally Sy and I sneaked onto the beach, no war was going to keep us off our appointed frost fishing grounds. We went on moonless nights too (after all we had the acute vision of the young). “Fishing” was usually great but on several occasions the Coast Guard patrol picked us up and transported us in their Jeep back to the boardwalk where we started, with an admonition to go home and not to do it again. We were fortunate in that it was different patrol guards that picked us up on our subsequent fishing expeditions.
Frost fishing today is a thing of the past, as I understand, as the commercial fishing fleets have so depopulated the ocean of these species and they no longer feed close to shore where the waves can toss them onto the beach.
After relating this to my wife she is still of the mind that 1. It is still “freezing” outside. 2. The dogs still have to be walked. AND 3. “Because you were foolish enough to suffer the cold voluntarily doesn't mean I have to …..and besides there are no fish on the route we take.”
END
Baby, it's cold outside - or is it?
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
Baby, it's cold outside - or is it?
When Johnny Carson hosted the Tonight Show he sometimes mentioned the weather in Los Angeles when it was unusual. He would start with , “It was very cold in L.A. today….” And before he continued the audience would shout out as one voice, “HOW COLD WAS IT?” Then Johnny would answer, "It was so cold today, a cab driver was saying something to a pedestrian and his middle finger froze."
I was reminded of this recently when my wife was complaining about the “freezing” weather and also something about having to walk the dogs, the combination of which leads to happy frisky walkees and an irritated chilled walker. And this was with temps in the mid 40’s!
“When I was a kid we would consider weather like this to be tropical. And what‘s more in the really frigid times we used to go fishing”, I said. “Sure”, she demurred with the hint of a smirk. “It’s true. Let me tell you.” And I continued:
It’s the dead of winter, bundled against cold and sometimes whipping cold weather wearing at least two of everything , what was later called “layering”, ……underwear, pants, sweaters socks, hats that rolled down to cover our ears,…..Sy and I went frost fishing. We were about 12 or 13. For this “fishing” all you needed was a burlap sack, papa’s boots stuffed with newspaper both for isolation and to fill the space for our smaller feet , and gloves (those brown cotton ones, we wore 2 pair of them also) that usually got soaked in short order. We would walk along the shore line on the Rockaway Beach peninsula in New York and pick up the “frost” fish ( I learned later they are called whitings or silver hake) which had been tossed onto the beach by the surf . They would be flash frozen. Most were stiff but many were still wriggling trying to get back to the ocean on the next wave when we picked them up. The moon reflected off their silver bellies and it was a beautiful sight to see the flashing shimmering light of this manna from the sea - almost like the brilliance of fireflies on summer nights. On moonless nights we used flash lights to reveal the silver of the beached fish. We had to time it so that we had a full 40 -50 lb. sack when we returned to our starting point. When there were other frost fishers on the shore it was a competition to see who got to the fish first. If I concentrate I can still feel the sting of frigid air with each inhalation and see the heavy smoke on exhale.
After we lugged our bounty home our mothers’ cleaned what our family was to eat, there were no freezers at that time (in fact a wooden crate from the “fruit store”, with a shelf in the center that formerly held oranges, was nailed to the outside of the kitchen window and freezing temperatures would keep frozen whatever was put in it during the cold months). The ice box was just that. The majority of the fish we sold by going door to door in the neighborhood for 5 cents, and 10 cents for the larger ones. We always liked to go fishing Thursday night so we could sell the fish to our Catholic neighbors for their Friday suppers. Many depended on us for those fresh beauties and the affordable price.
During the war years, WW2, the beach was patrolled by the Coast Guard so that no spy could signal Nazi U-boats which were thought to be off the Atlantic coast. Naturally Sy and I sneaked onto the beach, no war was going to keep us off our appointed frost fishing grounds. We went on moonless nights too (after all we had the acute vision of the young). “Fishing” was usually great but on several occasions the Coast Guard patrol picked us up and transported us in their Jeep back to the boardwalk where we started, with an admonition to go home and not to do it again. We were fortunate in that it was different patrol guards that picked us up on our subsequent fishing expeditions.
Frost fishing today is a thing of the past, as I understand, as the commercial fishing fleets have so depopulated the ocean of these species and they no longer feed close to shore where the waves can toss them onto the beach.
After relating this to my wife she is still of the mind that 1. It is still “freezing” outside. 2. The dogs still have to be walked. AND 3. “Because you were foolish enough to suffer the cold voluntarily doesn't mean I have to …..and besides there are no fish on the route we take.”
END
Sunday, January 07, 2007
1/6/07
2006 News that wasn't
Tri--O's
Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
It’s that time of year again when there are a lot of Top Ten listings of highlighted events of the past year. We all know, and are reminded once more, of the major happenings both here and around the world. But here at Tri--O’s we dig deeper than the front page headlines and point out items that may have been overlooked on page 19A, below the fold. These too have a place in the history that was, but they were not given the large print reporting. Here goes:
“Is this seat taken?”, he asked pointing to the vacant chair next to her. She then went into a tirade and threatened to kill him. This by itself would be ludicrous but it happened to a man while attending an anger management group in Indiana. Good thing he asked before sitting, otherwise she might have acted without giving him warning and just imagine if he had asked for her phone number! Ka-Pow!! One would safely surmise that she is single and lives alone with a pet gargoyle.
Then there was this guy with two prosthetic legs exiting a Chicago lounge after having one too many who offered to give a ride home to a deaf man whose speech he couldn't understand. After many miles and seemingly not getting any closer to the deaf man’s home the driver attempted to drop the man off at a county airport. They were “debating”, as best they could, the situation outside of the car whereupon the frustrated hearing impaired man knocked down the handicapped driver. Someone called 911. Police came. The officer wrote on his note to the hitter that he was under arrest for battery and arrested the hitee on a DUI. The driver might have appealed the charge, but personally I don't think he had a leg to stand on.
Thousands of wild parrots are roosting in Pomona Valley in Southern Calif.. These birds are native to tropical northeast Mexico and may be here illegally but here they nest nevertheless. The residents are complaining that they are loud and make for sleepless nights. Add to the fact that they live for 30-40 years and you have a plot right out of Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds”. I guess no one in town dare ask, “Polly want a cracker?” for fear of being pecked to death.
It’s winter in Maine and yet the lakes and ponds on Bar Harbor remained virtually ice-free through December, which is highly unusual. Is Al Gore right about the theory of global warming? Or is it that the rain in Maine stayed mainly as the rain?
The lighted Christmas display in Kenosha, Wis, spelled out “Melissa will you marry me?”. It was the unique proposal that Brian knew would get Melissa to say “Yes”, and it worked. But it is rumored that good old innovative Santa had used a similar device to get Mrs. Claus’ acquiescence many years ago, before the advent of electric lights. Except he spelled out his request with reindeer droppings in the snow.
The man was just trying to be friendly to the panda in the Beijing zoo but the alcohol on his breath may have triggered GuGu to bite him on the leg when he jumped the enclosure and startled the animal awake. The would-be petter then bit the panda on the fuzzy back . Gu Gu countered by biting his other leg. Call it a draw as the zoo keeper ended the bout by spraying water on the panda. A zoo spokeswoman affirmed Gu Gu’s health and said they would not press charges. Which begs the question: could the offender have been charged with pandering and the zoo thus be given a black eye?
We look forward to more zany news in 2007. Happy New Year.
Three word result
Several weeks ago we reported on an NPR survey which asked : How would you describe America in three words? We requested reader three word input. Responses came from Florida to Alaska, thank you for taking the time to answer. Bear in mind that no statistical accuracy is claimed. The results:
Free (3) proud (2) beautiful (2) naive (2) . One for each of the following:
Self absorbed - self righteous - hypocritical - innovative - generous - humorous - happy- over indulgent - diverse - economically imbalanced - decent -courageous - enterprising - opportunity - stability- opportunistic- indifferent- misdirected - apathetic - misinformed - greedy - fabulous - blessed - endangered - corrupt- disenchanted
Some sent 3 word phrases: country of freedom - best there is - my own country - the very best - speak my mind - full of promise . And one reader contributed oxymoron: individual rights .
Which all goes to show what a free, proud, and beautifully naive people we are. God bless us, everyone.
END
2006 News that wasn't
Tri--O's
Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
It’s that time of year again when there are a lot of Top Ten listings of highlighted events of the past year. We all know, and are reminded once more, of the major happenings both here and around the world. But here at Tri--O’s we dig deeper than the front page headlines and point out items that may have been overlooked on page 19A, below the fold. These too have a place in the history that was, but they were not given the large print reporting. Here goes:
“Is this seat taken?”, he asked pointing to the vacant chair next to her. She then went into a tirade and threatened to kill him. This by itself would be ludicrous but it happened to a man while attending an anger management group in Indiana. Good thing he asked before sitting, otherwise she might have acted without giving him warning and just imagine if he had asked for her phone number! Ka-Pow!! One would safely surmise that she is single and lives alone with a pet gargoyle.
Then there was this guy with two prosthetic legs exiting a Chicago lounge after having one too many who offered to give a ride home to a deaf man whose speech he couldn't understand. After many miles and seemingly not getting any closer to the deaf man’s home the driver attempted to drop the man off at a county airport. They were “debating”, as best they could, the situation outside of the car whereupon the frustrated hearing impaired man knocked down the handicapped driver. Someone called 911. Police came. The officer wrote on his note to the hitter that he was under arrest for battery and arrested the hitee on a DUI. The driver might have appealed the charge, but personally I don't think he had a leg to stand on.
Thousands of wild parrots are roosting in Pomona Valley in Southern Calif.. These birds are native to tropical northeast Mexico and may be here illegally but here they nest nevertheless. The residents are complaining that they are loud and make for sleepless nights. Add to the fact that they live for 30-40 years and you have a plot right out of Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds”. I guess no one in town dare ask, “Polly want a cracker?” for fear of being pecked to death.
It’s winter in Maine and yet the lakes and ponds on Bar Harbor remained virtually ice-free through December, which is highly unusual. Is Al Gore right about the theory of global warming? Or is it that the rain in Maine stayed mainly as the rain?
The lighted Christmas display in Kenosha, Wis, spelled out “Melissa will you marry me?”. It was the unique proposal that Brian knew would get Melissa to say “Yes”, and it worked. But it is rumored that good old innovative Santa had used a similar device to get Mrs. Claus’ acquiescence many years ago, before the advent of electric lights. Except he spelled out his request with reindeer droppings in the snow.
The man was just trying to be friendly to the panda in the Beijing zoo but the alcohol on his breath may have triggered GuGu to bite him on the leg when he jumped the enclosure and startled the animal awake. The would-be petter then bit the panda on the fuzzy back . Gu Gu countered by biting his other leg. Call it a draw as the zoo keeper ended the bout by spraying water on the panda. A zoo spokeswoman affirmed Gu Gu’s health and said they would not press charges. Which begs the question: could the offender have been charged with pandering and the zoo thus be given a black eye?
We look forward to more zany news in 2007. Happy New Year.
Three word result
Several weeks ago we reported on an NPR survey which asked : How would you describe America in three words? We requested reader three word input. Responses came from Florida to Alaska, thank you for taking the time to answer. Bear in mind that no statistical accuracy is claimed. The results:
Free (3) proud (2) beautiful (2) naive (2) . One for each of the following:
Self absorbed - self righteous - hypocritical - innovative - generous - humorous - happy- over indulgent - diverse - economically imbalanced - decent -courageous - enterprising - opportunity - stability- opportunistic- indifferent- misdirected - apathetic - misinformed - greedy - fabulous - blessed - endangered - corrupt- disenchanted
Some sent 3 word phrases: country of freedom - best there is - my own country - the very best - speak my mind - full of promise . And one reader contributed oxymoron: individual rights .
Which all goes to show what a free, proud, and beautifully naive people we are. God bless us, everyone.
END
Saturday, December 23, 2006
12/23/06
Miracles 101
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
At this time of year we hear of Christmas miracles. Positive outcomes from dire situations with unaccounted explanations as to how they occurred. Credit a higher power or just plain luck for the intervention, however they occurred; but there are those who can attribute their own "miracle" to their own effort or being in the right place at the right time. Here are a few examples.
Henrico Frank was a 37 year old construction worker unemployed for the last six years in Germany, which has four million unemployed (almost 10 percent). The mall at Christmas time in Wiesbaden was busy as he strolled through, " wearing grubby clothes, a pair of nose rings and a thatch of partially bleached, punk-inspired hair." He happened to see the chairman of the Social Democratic Party , Kurt Beck, who was then berated by Frank for the failure of economic reforms to help people like himself to find work and have a better life. Beck responded, "If you would just wash and shave, you'd find a job, too."Two days later Frank called a news conference. He had a different look. A trim haircut, clean shaven, no nose rings. "I am ready to change," the newly chiseled Frank stated, "I’ll take any job." The media picked up on it and he stepped into his 15 minutes of fame as he became the main news feature and his before-and-after makeover photos appeared on front pages. Beck now plans to present Frank with several job offers.
Yu Minhong taught English at Beijing University but he quit this secure position and started up a business to help students develop their English skills. Since then he has helped hundreds of thousands of Chinese students get into U.S. universities."The company, New Oriental Education and Technology Group, was listed on the New York Stock Exchange in September, the first private education company to achieve this feat. Yu is thought to be China's richest teacher with about 2 billion yuan (250 million U.S. dollars) of assets." states the Guangzhou web site.It was no easy road for Yu. His father was a peasant and carpenter and Yu watched him collect bits of waste brick and stones and stack them up in the small courtyard of their rural home. Slowly Yu saw his father transform the stones into a small pen to shut in the pigs, hens and ducks. At that time, his family could not afford to buy bricks. He remembers his father telling him, "If a pyramid was dismantled, it would just be a pile of stones. If you live your life without an aim, it's just a heap of days." His father's patient stone-piling lesson had tremendous influence and today Yu's company no longer only teaches English. His business has extended to other foreign language training, preparing students for tests, primary and secondary school education and software as well as on-line education. In 1993, New Oriental had only 30 students today it is China's largest private education service provider with more than three million student enrollments. There is a network of 25 schools and 111 learning centers in 24 cities, an on-line network that has attracted 2 million registered users. Clearly, teaching English can make people rich in China.
She was just 21 when Lisa Renshaw offered to work for free, in exchange for equity, to the owner of a troubled downtown Baltimore parking lot . The owner left town soon after, taking the loan of $3,000 that Renshaw had taken out in her name. She stayed, renegotiated the lease, and bargained to lower the monthly payments in order to achieve breaking even.She built the business by greeting customers daily, handing out fliers, promoting heavily to Amtrak riders who used a nearby station, offering carpooling assistance, and giving free car washes to anyone who parked in her lot for five days. The lot's occupancy rate increased from less than 10% to more than 70% in three years. Of late she employed 300 people, with 68 garages and parking lots, and generating $28 million in annual revenues.This is the same gutsy lady who lived in a 10 x 12 foot room for three and a half years while she built her parking garage into a respectable business.
The people above achieved their goals by taking it upon themselves to create their own destiny. Devine intervention is most welcome and appreciated at any time but a little self initiative and a lot of "stick- to- it-tivity" goes a long way. So while you wait for help from Clarence, Angel-second class, as did Jimmie Stewart in "It’s A Wonderful Life", you may want to give those bootstraps a yank.
End
Miracles 101
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
At this time of year we hear of Christmas miracles. Positive outcomes from dire situations with unaccounted explanations as to how they occurred. Credit a higher power or just plain luck for the intervention, however they occurred; but there are those who can attribute their own "miracle" to their own effort or being in the right place at the right time. Here are a few examples.
Henrico Frank was a 37 year old construction worker unemployed for the last six years in Germany, which has four million unemployed (almost 10 percent). The mall at Christmas time in Wiesbaden was busy as he strolled through, " wearing grubby clothes, a pair of nose rings and a thatch of partially bleached, punk-inspired hair." He happened to see the chairman of the Social Democratic Party , Kurt Beck, who was then berated by Frank for the failure of economic reforms to help people like himself to find work and have a better life. Beck responded, "If you would just wash and shave, you'd find a job, too."Two days later Frank called a news conference. He had a different look. A trim haircut, clean shaven, no nose rings. "I am ready to change," the newly chiseled Frank stated, "I’ll take any job." The media picked up on it and he stepped into his 15 minutes of fame as he became the main news feature and his before-and-after makeover photos appeared on front pages. Beck now plans to present Frank with several job offers.
Yu Minhong taught English at Beijing University but he quit this secure position and started up a business to help students develop their English skills. Since then he has helped hundreds of thousands of Chinese students get into U.S. universities."The company, New Oriental Education and Technology Group, was listed on the New York Stock Exchange in September, the first private education company to achieve this feat. Yu is thought to be China's richest teacher with about 2 billion yuan (250 million U.S. dollars) of assets." states the Guangzhou web site.It was no easy road for Yu. His father was a peasant and carpenter and Yu watched him collect bits of waste brick and stones and stack them up in the small courtyard of their rural home. Slowly Yu saw his father transform the stones into a small pen to shut in the pigs, hens and ducks. At that time, his family could not afford to buy bricks. He remembers his father telling him, "If a pyramid was dismantled, it would just be a pile of stones. If you live your life without an aim, it's just a heap of days." His father's patient stone-piling lesson had tremendous influence and today Yu's company no longer only teaches English. His business has extended to other foreign language training, preparing students for tests, primary and secondary school education and software as well as on-line education. In 1993, New Oriental had only 30 students today it is China's largest private education service provider with more than three million student enrollments. There is a network of 25 schools and 111 learning centers in 24 cities, an on-line network that has attracted 2 million registered users. Clearly, teaching English can make people rich in China.
She was just 21 when Lisa Renshaw offered to work for free, in exchange for equity, to the owner of a troubled downtown Baltimore parking lot . The owner left town soon after, taking the loan of $3,000 that Renshaw had taken out in her name. She stayed, renegotiated the lease, and bargained to lower the monthly payments in order to achieve breaking even.She built the business by greeting customers daily, handing out fliers, promoting heavily to Amtrak riders who used a nearby station, offering carpooling assistance, and giving free car washes to anyone who parked in her lot for five days. The lot's occupancy rate increased from less than 10% to more than 70% in three years. Of late she employed 300 people, with 68 garages and parking lots, and generating $28 million in annual revenues.This is the same gutsy lady who lived in a 10 x 12 foot room for three and a half years while she built her parking garage into a respectable business.
The people above achieved their goals by taking it upon themselves to create their own destiny. Devine intervention is most welcome and appreciated at any time but a little self initiative and a lot of "stick- to- it-tivity" goes a long way. So while you wait for help from Clarence, Angel-second class, as did Jimmie Stewart in "It’s A Wonderful Life", you may want to give those bootstraps a yank.
End
Thursday, December 14, 2006
12/8/06
Autumn’s eve thoughts on words
By Herb Kandel
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
Autumn’s eve thoughts on words
Three Little Big Words
On a Public Broadcast Service web site called P.O.V. (Point of View) they posed the question “How would you describe America in three words?” to people both here and from around the globe. There was no claim to scientific accuracy in the survey. The answers were somewhat surprising, reassuring, and in several, disturbing. Similar to looking into a mirror then seeing that zit on your cheek was more prominent than you thought, but on the other hand you're having a good hair day. Here are the top 10 of what that particular mirror reflected in describing America - #10 Proud #9 Materialistic #8 (tie) Independent/Naïve #7 Powerful #6 Opportunity #5 Greedy #4 Arrogant #3 Diverse #2 Freedom (combined with Free) and at #1 (bugle sound ….. ta-dah) Ignorant. So it looks like we, as a nation, are envisioned as a bunch of unaware dummies of assorted ethnicities who seek more “stuff” and flaunt our possessions because we have the power, chance and freedom to do so.
There is probably a smattering of truth in the descriptions as there is in any stereotyping but it seems that the overall concept has a suspicious tinge of envy with too loud a protest. If we are as appalling as 4 of the indicators portray us to be, why are so many seeking entry here? Is it because of the other 6, with freedom and opportunity in the forefront? I daresay “You got it.“
Had they asked me for my three words I would have suggested trustworthy, compassionate, and honorable. The Yiddish word “mensch”, that has migrated into everyday speech, encapsulates those, and similar type virtues. According to Leo Rosten, author of The Joys of Yiddish “[A] mensch is a someone to admire and emulate, someone of noble character. The key to being "a real mensch" is nothing less than character, rectitude, dignity, a sense of what is right, responsible, decorous.”
What would your three words be? Think about it and send me your choices with “3 words“ in the subject field*. The results will be tallied and reported..
World word replication?
In line with world perception of the U.S., The Guardian in the UK did a survey of 10 countries. One question asked was “Overall do you have a favourable [sic] or unfavourable [sic] opinion of Americans?” Favorable with 81% was Israel, 74% Japan, 73% Canada---- the bottom three who considered us unfavorably were Mexico 43%, Spain 32%, and South Korea 30%. To the question “By its actions, does the United States contribute to world peace?” The top three with a “Yes” were Mexico 63%, Israel 61%, Russia 48%---- the “No”’s were Japan 53%, Canada 52%, and South Korea 49%
Those statistics cause me to scratch my head. Some countries see us favorably and at the same time say that we do not contribute to world peace. That is about as divisive as was the campaign ads in the last election. Are they saying our intentions are noble but our means in achieving them is perverse? Or are these findings just an echoing of what we are experiencing here in the U.S., i.e., difference of opinions which led to the turnover of the congressional leadership? As in the song “We are the world , we are the people” conversely “We are the people, we are the world”. Therefore what the administration and its adversaries are pondering is the equivalent of what other countries are troubled about also. So it seems that how the world perceives us is the extrapolation of what we ourselves are experiencing here.
Redundant Words
Sometimes my hearing “envisions” speech as if it was monitoring an oscilloscope. There are familiar patterns that go along in normal sequences and then up pops a blip. Several months ago I vented about how the word “like” has insidiously burrowed its way into the vocabularies of teen-angers and celebrities. Every time the word is used the glitch spikes. It was mentioned then that the consistent use of the word renders the conversation trite, and downright boring.
Now my blips are occurring with more frequency and I seem to see the sheep are in the herding process again with a new word.. Have you noticed (heard) how “really” comes into speech patterns more and more ? If you listen you will hear “It really is” and it's counterparts making more inroads into everyday language. It is as if you have to insert “really” into a statement to give it an endorsement or an affirmation that what is said is verifiable and without question accurate. I recall the admonition to take as less than gospel anything that follows “To tell you the truth……….” .
So, like, remember your hearing it here, like, on the cutting edge. You really are!
* hekan@mail.com
END
Autumn’s eve thoughts on words
By Herb Kandel
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
Autumn’s eve thoughts on words
Three Little Big Words
On a Public Broadcast Service web site called P.O.V. (Point of View) they posed the question “How would you describe America in three words?” to people both here and from around the globe. There was no claim to scientific accuracy in the survey. The answers were somewhat surprising, reassuring, and in several, disturbing. Similar to looking into a mirror then seeing that zit on your cheek was more prominent than you thought, but on the other hand you're having a good hair day. Here are the top 10 of what that particular mirror reflected in describing America - #10 Proud #9 Materialistic #8 (tie) Independent/Naïve #7 Powerful #6 Opportunity #5 Greedy #4 Arrogant #3 Diverse #2 Freedom (combined with Free) and at #1 (bugle sound ….. ta-dah) Ignorant. So it looks like we, as a nation, are envisioned as a bunch of unaware dummies of assorted ethnicities who seek more “stuff” and flaunt our possessions because we have the power, chance and freedom to do so.
There is probably a smattering of truth in the descriptions as there is in any stereotyping but it seems that the overall concept has a suspicious tinge of envy with too loud a protest. If we are as appalling as 4 of the indicators portray us to be, why are so many seeking entry here? Is it because of the other 6, with freedom and opportunity in the forefront? I daresay “You got it.“
Had they asked me for my three words I would have suggested trustworthy, compassionate, and honorable. The Yiddish word “mensch”, that has migrated into everyday speech, encapsulates those, and similar type virtues. According to Leo Rosten, author of The Joys of Yiddish “[A] mensch is a someone to admire and emulate, someone of noble character. The key to being "a real mensch" is nothing less than character, rectitude, dignity, a sense of what is right, responsible, decorous.”
What would your three words be? Think about it and send me your choices with “3 words“ in the subject field*. The results will be tallied and reported..
World word replication?
In line with world perception of the U.S., The Guardian in the UK did a survey of 10 countries. One question asked was “Overall do you have a favourable [sic] or unfavourable [sic] opinion of Americans?” Favorable with 81% was Israel, 74% Japan, 73% Canada---- the bottom three who considered us unfavorably were Mexico 43%, Spain 32%, and South Korea 30%. To the question “By its actions, does the United States contribute to world peace?” The top three with a “Yes” were Mexico 63%, Israel 61%, Russia 48%---- the “No”’s were Japan 53%, Canada 52%, and South Korea 49%
Those statistics cause me to scratch my head. Some countries see us favorably and at the same time say that we do not contribute to world peace. That is about as divisive as was the campaign ads in the last election. Are they saying our intentions are noble but our means in achieving them is perverse? Or are these findings just an echoing of what we are experiencing here in the U.S., i.e., difference of opinions which led to the turnover of the congressional leadership? As in the song “We are the world , we are the people” conversely “We are the people, we are the world”. Therefore what the administration and its adversaries are pondering is the equivalent of what other countries are troubled about also. So it seems that how the world perceives us is the extrapolation of what we ourselves are experiencing here.
Redundant Words
Sometimes my hearing “envisions” speech as if it was monitoring an oscilloscope. There are familiar patterns that go along in normal sequences and then up pops a blip. Several months ago I vented about how the word “like” has insidiously burrowed its way into the vocabularies of teen-angers and celebrities. Every time the word is used the glitch spikes. It was mentioned then that the consistent use of the word renders the conversation trite, and downright boring.
Now my blips are occurring with more frequency and I seem to see the sheep are in the herding process again with a new word.. Have you noticed (heard) how “really” comes into speech patterns more and more ? If you listen you will hear “It really is” and it's counterparts making more inroads into everyday language. It is as if you have to insert “really” into a statement to give it an endorsement or an affirmation that what is said is verifiable and without question accurate. I recall the admonition to take as less than gospel anything that follows “To tell you the truth……….” .
So, like, remember your hearing it here, like, on the cutting edge. You really are!
* hekan@mail.com
END
Saturday, December 02, 2006
11/22/06
A Modest Proposal, Mon Cher
A Modest Proposal, Mon Cher
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
Well it’s happened. And now that it has we can predict with more certainty that the world as we have known it is changing, and it is probably not for the better. But wait, there may yet be some hope.
I’m referring to what happened in Paris, France last week and last year. There was just 1,188 kissers who showed up this past Thursday to try to break the Guinness World Records for the most people kissing on one place at one moment. It was far short as the record is still held by Budapest, where in 2005 they won it with 11,570 pairs of lips meeting. Or as Ross Perot would say “ Y’all listen to that big sucking sound.”
When the city known universally for romance and truffles loses to the city in which a Hungarian travel channel titled it "Budapest is a riot! That's why we love it!" and goulash, you know you are, as Harold Hill said , “in Trouble …….with a capital T and that rhymes with P and that stands for….” Paris.
This also marks the one-year anniversary of the urban uprising in France. There was a series of riots and violent clashes, involving mainly the burning of cars and public buildings by youth groups. Starting in the Paris area, the unrest subsequently spread to other regions. The violence involved mostly French citizens with North African origins, although not all. These events led to strong debates about integration and discrimination in France. And this past March there was a “strike” by students in the country to protest proposed new legislation that would allow employers to fire people, under the age of 26, who were on the job during the first two years .
What, you might ask, do these two seemingly non-related events have to do with each other and what is the glimmer of hope that was mentioned? Bear with me.
The reports state the arson, car burnings, and other attacks so far seem to be centered in Muslim and African communities. In September 2005, a soaring 21.7% of 15- to 24-year-olds in France were unemployed. And of this it is estimated that 3o-50% in that group is Muslim. According to my math, using a median figure of 40% unemployed, comes to over ¾ of a million Muslims. That, by any standard, is a lot of potential pucker-uppers.
Now supposing these unemployed folks would have all participated in the “kiss-off”. This would mean that some of the Muslim ladies would have to lift the face-covering veil, known as a niqab, and some of the men would do likewise with their ski masks. With all these new pursed lips this mammoth smooch would resonate from the Palais Royal to Place Pigalle and the city would snatch the title back from the Hungarians just as quickly as you could say “Pass the paprika” (and that‘S noting to sneeze at).
With the attention, prominence, and approbation that Paris would receive would come the visitors, tourists, and those vicarious seekers of pleasure who take delight in being where the action was, and hoping for some themselves. I propose the mantra “If you kiss a lot, they will spend”. This great influx of sightseers would require more people to handle all the necessary work involved. Think of all the employment opportunities this new burgeoning market would require… travel agents; transportation; hospitality; food production, preparation, and serving; accounting; advertising; security; sanitation; entertainment; lip balm; to say nothing of health care (the BBC reports “ well over 5 million bacteria are exchanged in one long, lingering passionate kiss”), and the list goes on.
There, my friends, is a simple solution to a situation requiring no G8 summit conference. Think of it……..the simplicity of a kiss to change a whole economy and lead to social reform. So simple, it’s origin according to one version, comes from the transfer of pre-chewed food from a mother to her baby in primitive times and later to adults. The Indian culture believed there was a joining of souls when two people exchanged exhaled breath. And the Ingrid Bergman theory, "a kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous".
Regardless of how it came about the kiss is here to stay. So all the French government has to do is ask their citizens , “ Can’t we all just kiss together?”. And to propose to the Muslim community ( apologies to Oscar Hammerstein) “ditch that mask and lift that veil, you’ll get a lot of work and there’ll be no bail”. For without a coming together , France will become a playground for only the very well-to-do, where the biggest growth industries will be security and the Gendarmes.
END
Friday, November 03, 2006
11/1/06
In Praise of the Good and Long Lasting
By Herb Kandel
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
In these days of IM (instant messaging), instant phone photos, instant online streaming, instant coffee, and the sought after instant gratification, it seems that we should pull in the reins of the stop watch and savor a few of the everyday, taken-for-granted, quality products that we benefit from. These may not be world shaking item recognitions, but they have made life easier, safer, more productive, and palatable.
I don’t remember the last time I bought a styptic pencil. Perhaps 20 years ago, or I may be using the same one my father had. This is the handy dandy item that staunch the bleeding when you get a "gotcha‘" nick while shaving. This small white cylinder of aluminum sulfate that is so inexpensive and does what it was made to do is a product worthy of mention. How the manufacturers remain in business is a mystery, as they last so long. Their only detractor seems to be Dracula.
Think about the simplicity of the paper clip. Yes, that bent piece of wire that grips several sheets of paper together . Did you know that before the paper clip was invented by a Norwegian in 1899, straight pins were being sold by the half pound for the explicit purpose of temporarily fastening pages . Ouch!!
Speaking of wire.....the shaped wire coat hanger performs it’s intended purpose masterfully. Before the hanger was invented, in 1903, there was the wall hook or wooden peg, which eventually stretched and distorted the garment that was hung from it. And I wonder how many car doors that this device has opened, used as a TV antenna, to roast marshmallows, to reach anything unreachable, and the list goes on and on.
Sara Lee Pound Cake is still a treasure that never fails to please. A consistent quality product which you can count on plain, toasted, or as French toast.
Many years ago I bought a white nylon comb from the Fuller Brush man. The comb has served me well as it segued from brown thick locks to sparse gray on this head. Fuller products were known for being pricey but their quality more than made up for it in their dependability and longevity. Although I have not seen a door-to-door Fuller Brush person in decades I am glad to see that they are still available online.
I don’t know how many times have I dropped my Sony Walkman, but when it happened I was not concerned that it would shatter. It has withstood a lot of sudden floor and sidewalk contact. I wonder if the iPod can do that well? So play it again, Sam.
Ever own a Cross pen or pencil? They will repair or replace them for free as long as you own them. This policy was tested recently when a 20 year old pen was sent to them for repair and returned in tip-top shape. Write on!
When I was growing up there seemed to be a shoe repair shop every few blocks. Of late that trade has almost, but not quite, gone the way of buggy whips. One of the reasons is the Birkenstock line of foot wear. They seem to wear like iron and yet remain comfortable. Johann Adam Birkenstock cobbled his shoes in Germany in the late 1700's. His shoes were designed so that they would follow the shape of the persons feet, so he contoured them to do just that. Though they have industrialized the manufacturing they still maintain the quality of the product sculpted by the originator using his hand tools. To paraphrase the motto on the historic flag, "Please Tread On Me" should be their slogan.
The year was 1896 and Austrian immigrant Leo Hirshfield stirs his batch of chocolatey, chewy candy, which he names after his five-year-old daughter, Clara, whose nickname is "Tootsie". It was the first penny candy to be individually wrapped in paper. In 110 years it is reported that it still looks and tastes astoundingly like the first Tootsie Roll, and even more unbelievable it still sells for about the same price. The company produces more than sixty two million per day. How sweet it is!!
The next time you use a zipper or can opener, taste peanut butter or an ice cream cone, wear Levi’s jeans or L.L. Bean boots, think of what you might have missed had not someone of integrity sought a better way to accomplish that task which is now such a part of everyday living comfort. So here is a nod of thanks to those folks for the things we take for granted being well made, long lasting, and for contributing to our well being.
END
In Praise of the Good and Long Lasting
By Herb Kandel
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
In these days of IM (instant messaging), instant phone photos, instant online streaming, instant coffee, and the sought after instant gratification, it seems that we should pull in the reins of the stop watch and savor a few of the everyday, taken-for-granted, quality products that we benefit from. These may not be world shaking item recognitions, but they have made life easier, safer, more productive, and palatable.
I don’t remember the last time I bought a styptic pencil. Perhaps 20 years ago, or I may be using the same one my father had. This is the handy dandy item that staunch the bleeding when you get a "gotcha‘" nick while shaving. This small white cylinder of aluminum sulfate that is so inexpensive and does what it was made to do is a product worthy of mention. How the manufacturers remain in business is a mystery, as they last so long. Their only detractor seems to be Dracula.
Think about the simplicity of the paper clip. Yes, that bent piece of wire that grips several sheets of paper together . Did you know that before the paper clip was invented by a Norwegian in 1899, straight pins were being sold by the half pound for the explicit purpose of temporarily fastening pages . Ouch!!
Speaking of wire.....the shaped wire coat hanger performs it’s intended purpose masterfully. Before the hanger was invented, in 1903, there was the wall hook or wooden peg, which eventually stretched and distorted the garment that was hung from it. And I wonder how many car doors that this device has opened, used as a TV antenna, to roast marshmallows, to reach anything unreachable, and the list goes on and on.
Sara Lee Pound Cake is still a treasure that never fails to please. A consistent quality product which you can count on plain, toasted, or as French toast.
Many years ago I bought a white nylon comb from the Fuller Brush man. The comb has served me well as it segued from brown thick locks to sparse gray on this head. Fuller products were known for being pricey but their quality more than made up for it in their dependability and longevity. Although I have not seen a door-to-door Fuller Brush person in decades I am glad to see that they are still available online.
I don’t know how many times have I dropped my Sony Walkman, but when it happened I was not concerned that it would shatter. It has withstood a lot of sudden floor and sidewalk contact. I wonder if the iPod can do that well? So play it again, Sam.
Ever own a Cross pen or pencil? They will repair or replace them for free as long as you own them. This policy was tested recently when a 20 year old pen was sent to them for repair and returned in tip-top shape. Write on!
When I was growing up there seemed to be a shoe repair shop every few blocks. Of late that trade has almost, but not quite, gone the way of buggy whips. One of the reasons is the Birkenstock line of foot wear. They seem to wear like iron and yet remain comfortable. Johann Adam Birkenstock cobbled his shoes in Germany in the late 1700's. His shoes were designed so that they would follow the shape of the persons feet, so he contoured them to do just that. Though they have industrialized the manufacturing they still maintain the quality of the product sculpted by the originator using his hand tools. To paraphrase the motto on the historic flag, "Please Tread On Me" should be their slogan.
The year was 1896 and Austrian immigrant Leo Hirshfield stirs his batch of chocolatey, chewy candy, which he names after his five-year-old daughter, Clara, whose nickname is "Tootsie". It was the first penny candy to be individually wrapped in paper. In 110 years it is reported that it still looks and tastes astoundingly like the first Tootsie Roll, and even more unbelievable it still sells for about the same price. The company produces more than sixty two million per day. How sweet it is!!
The next time you use a zipper or can opener, taste peanut butter or an ice cream cone, wear Levi’s jeans or L.L. Bean boots, think of what you might have missed had not someone of integrity sought a better way to accomplish that task which is now such a part of everyday living comfort. So here is a nod of thanks to those folks for the things we take for granted being well made, long lasting, and for contributing to our well being.
END
Thursday, October 19, 2006
10/18/06
Where have all the funnies gone?
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
One of the joys while growing up was the anticipation every Sunday of reading the “funny pages” of the newspaper. Those Technicolor panels had a life of their own. I was reminded of that time recently.
This past October 4th marked a milestone event, Dick Tracy, the comic strip, turned 75. This staunch defender of the people whose jutting square jaw and broken nose, resembling a numeral “7”, is really older. When first drawn by Chester Gould in 1931 Tracy was a 34 year old bachelor, which would really makes him over 109 years old today. Gould retired in 1977, and died in 1985. The strip is now created by Dick Locher and Michael Kilian but it has much less newspaper syndication. A quick précis of our hero follows.
Tracy became a detective in order to avenge the kidnapping of Tess Trueheart (who became his wife in 1949) and the killing of her father. Gould’s was the first comic strip to approach crime, violence, justice and morality by using news “ripped from the headlines”. Along the way he introduced memorable villains. Those of a certain age will recall his side-show of those characters, among them The Brow, The Blank, Mr. And Mrs. Pruneface, Mole, B.B. Eyes, Little Face, Measels, Mumbles, Flattop, Flyface, Lispy, and in 1977, (gasp) Heroin Herbert .
Gould let us meet Gravel Gerty and B.O. Plenty who were the parents of the beautifully mutated Sparkle Plenty (which spawned a best selling line of dolls 12 years before Barbie). The capitalist Diet Smith gave Tracy the two-way wrist radio in 1946 (that was the first “can you hear me now?“ ) which later was replaced by a wrist-TV and then again into a computer; in 1947 Tracy wore a miniature camera as a ring.
Tracy was parodied by Al Capp in “Li’l Abner”. Abner was a hero-worshipper of Tracy-like “Fearless Fosdick” thus becoming a comic strip within a comic strip (more about Abner below).
Tracy became a grandfather when Sparkle Plenty Jr. Was born in 1988, she is the daughter of Junior Tracy‘S and his second wife, Sparkle Plenty. In 1994 Tess and Tracy were heading toward splitsville but they subsequently reconciled and in 1999 they celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. The crusader is still perusing thugs and justice for all.
The aforementioned “L’il Abner” strip showed a lovable, naïve, muscled, good natured hillbilly, Abner Yokum, always trying to evade the marital intentions of the beautiful, faithful and blouse stretching Daisy Mae. Capp invented the city of Dogpatch and a cast of memorable characters such as Marryin' Sam, Wolf Gal, Lena the Hyena, Indian Lonesome Polecat, Moonbeam McSwine, Stupefyin' Jones, Appassionata von Climax, and Sadie Hawkins . He also created the Shmoo which posed a threat to the world economy as they need only air as sustenance, they craved to be eaten ( fried they tasted like chicken , roasted like beef, raw like oysters). They also produced eggs, milk, butter, leather, buttons, and timber. They were ideal playmates for young children and the most perfect subsistence creature . So who needed to work?
Those two were my favorites but there were others whose adventures I followed as I entered their world. “Terry and the Pirates” took us to the intriguing Far East and the sinister (but later ally) The Dragon Lady. Milton Caniff , Terry’s artist, later created Steve Canyon. “Smilin’ Jack” was the mustached daredevil pilot who had as a sidekick Fatstuff, his Hawaiian friend who always popped his shirt buttons (usually into the gaping mouths of chickens). There was the chinless “Andy Gump” (no relation to Forrest) and his family which faced everyday quandaries as did Uncle Walt and Skeezix in “Gasoline Alley”, these were some of the first comic strip soap operas. “Henry” was a young, bald, very precocious boy who went though all the panels in pantomime, the same as the portly “The Little King”. “Prince Valiant” took us to the days of King Arthur and to a fantasy world of castles, witches, battles, and chivalry all in rich artistry and blazing colors. Walt Kelly’s “Pogo” was a joke a day while “Little Orphan Annie” fought political battles, never changing her red dress or having eye pupils.
So I ask again, Where have all the funnies gone? And answer:
All my above friends have been deferred to another place , but not forgotten. Just as Little Jackie Paper in the land of Hanah Lee, we put aside the “painted wings and giant rings”. Yet they linger lastingly in the folds of our memories ..….and for sale on the pages of eBay.
END
Where have all the funnies gone?
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
One of the joys while growing up was the anticipation every Sunday of reading the “funny pages” of the newspaper. Those Technicolor panels had a life of their own. I was reminded of that time recently.
This past October 4th marked a milestone event, Dick Tracy, the comic strip, turned 75. This staunch defender of the people whose jutting square jaw and broken nose, resembling a numeral “7”, is really older. When first drawn by Chester Gould in 1931 Tracy was a 34 year old bachelor, which would really makes him over 109 years old today. Gould retired in 1977, and died in 1985. The strip is now created by Dick Locher and Michael Kilian but it has much less newspaper syndication. A quick précis of our hero follows.
Tracy became a detective in order to avenge the kidnapping of Tess Trueheart (who became his wife in 1949) and the killing of her father. Gould’s was the first comic strip to approach crime, violence, justice and morality by using news “ripped from the headlines”. Along the way he introduced memorable villains. Those of a certain age will recall his side-show of those characters, among them The Brow, The Blank, Mr. And Mrs. Pruneface, Mole, B.B. Eyes, Little Face, Measels, Mumbles, Flattop, Flyface, Lispy, and in 1977, (gasp) Heroin Herbert .
Gould let us meet Gravel Gerty and B.O. Plenty who were the parents of the beautifully mutated Sparkle Plenty (which spawned a best selling line of dolls 12 years before Barbie). The capitalist Diet Smith gave Tracy the two-way wrist radio in 1946 (that was the first “can you hear me now?“ ) which later was replaced by a wrist-TV and then again into a computer; in 1947 Tracy wore a miniature camera as a ring.
Tracy was parodied by Al Capp in “Li’l Abner”. Abner was a hero-worshipper of Tracy-like “Fearless Fosdick” thus becoming a comic strip within a comic strip (more about Abner below).
Tracy became a grandfather when Sparkle Plenty Jr. Was born in 1988, she is the daughter of Junior Tracy‘S and his second wife, Sparkle Plenty. In 1994 Tess and Tracy were heading toward splitsville but they subsequently reconciled and in 1999 they celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. The crusader is still perusing thugs and justice for all.
The aforementioned “L’il Abner” strip showed a lovable, naïve, muscled, good natured hillbilly, Abner Yokum, always trying to evade the marital intentions of the beautiful, faithful and blouse stretching Daisy Mae. Capp invented the city of Dogpatch and a cast of memorable characters such as Marryin' Sam, Wolf Gal, Lena the Hyena, Indian Lonesome Polecat, Moonbeam McSwine, Stupefyin' Jones, Appassionata von Climax, and Sadie Hawkins . He also created the Shmoo which posed a threat to the world economy as they need only air as sustenance, they craved to be eaten ( fried they tasted like chicken , roasted like beef, raw like oysters). They also produced eggs, milk, butter, leather, buttons, and timber. They were ideal playmates for young children and the most perfect subsistence creature . So who needed to work?
Those two were my favorites but there were others whose adventures I followed as I entered their world. “Terry and the Pirates” took us to the intriguing Far East and the sinister (but later ally) The Dragon Lady. Milton Caniff , Terry’s artist, later created Steve Canyon. “Smilin’ Jack” was the mustached daredevil pilot who had as a sidekick Fatstuff, his Hawaiian friend who always popped his shirt buttons (usually into the gaping mouths of chickens). There was the chinless “Andy Gump” (no relation to Forrest) and his family which faced everyday quandaries as did Uncle Walt and Skeezix in “Gasoline Alley”, these were some of the first comic strip soap operas. “Henry” was a young, bald, very precocious boy who went though all the panels in pantomime, the same as the portly “The Little King”. “Prince Valiant” took us to the days of King Arthur and to a fantasy world of castles, witches, battles, and chivalry all in rich artistry and blazing colors. Walt Kelly’s “Pogo” was a joke a day while “Little Orphan Annie” fought political battles, never changing her red dress or having eye pupils.
So I ask again, Where have all the funnies gone? And answer:
All my above friends have been deferred to another place , but not forgotten. Just as Little Jackie Paper in the land of Hanah Lee, we put aside the “painted wings and giant rings”. Yet they linger lastingly in the folds of our memories ..….and for sale on the pages of eBay.
END
Saturday, October 07, 2006
10/4/06
Bigger Brother Is Coming
Tri-O's Oddities, observations, and opinions
By Herb Kandel
A few weeks ago I received a reminder from the Department of Motor Vehicles that my driver license had expired. Not wanting to be a scofflaw on the highways, I drove, with extreme care, to the DMV office where I pulled my number ticket from the dispenser (just like the ones in Marble Slab) and waited for my No. 41 to be called. When it was I learned that I had 60 days from expiration date in which to renew, whew, I no longer felt my face was on the post office “Most Wanted” bulletin board. After paying my $23 and smiling for the photo I was licensed for another 4 years. The whole process took 25 minutes. It may take a lot longer next time, and not only for me.
It seems in May 2005, affixed to a $82 billion emergency spending package that provided money for the military and for tsunami relief, Congress passed the Real ID ACT which is intended to make it tougher for terrorists to obtain driver's licenses and for people without proper identification to board planes, enter federal buildings, and more. Starting May 2008 the law will require states to use sources like birth certificates and national immigration databases to verify that people applying for or renewing driver's licenses are American citizens or legal residents. The kinks will have to be worked out but be prepared for the wait (pretend you are in a doctor’s waiting room).
The card will be electronically readable. You will need this card for almost everything if you live or work in the United States. Not only to board an airplane, but also to open a bank account, collect Social Security payments, or utilize nearly any government service. The Department of Homeland Security is in charge of the Real ID Act. A report released last week by several state government leadership organizations estimates the cost of implementing the Real ID Act at more than $11 billion over the first five years. ”Also, each applicant will need three to four identity documents, and each of those need independent verification.”The information it will encode is name, birth date, sex, ID number, a digital photograph, address, in machine-readable technology.. They are permitted to add additional items such as a fingerprint or retinal scan. We are clueless as to the other identifiers at this time.
What if other establishments had similar requirements and you needed substantiated proof that you are indeed who you are, and are entitled to utilize or purchase their products and/or services. Hmmm…….let’s think:
Let’s say you want to buy a new pair of shoes. The salesperson, with narrowing eyebrows asks, “Is your toe print on file? Have your shoes ever been confiscated before boarding a plane? Do you intend to wear these shoes in a foreign country? “
Go into a coffee shop and you may have to show the person dispensing the latte the card that declares that you are not allergic to caffeine if you have not ordered a de-caf beverage.
The sign in the barber shop and hair salon boldly states “ All hair cuttings will be subject to DNA analysis and We can refuse service to anyone NOT registered (blondes excluded)”
Your health insurance company sends you a letter to the effect, “Electronic monitoring shows that you smoked, or were in the vicinity of smokers, and inhaled fumes. Your premium has been increased 15%”
The AARP now requires a Real ID card swipe for membership entry, but fear not, new rules make anyone breathing eligible.
You go to see an R rated horror movie, the person in the box office refuses you entry because your card indicates you have a heart condition (and you were not allowed buttered popcorn anyway).
The supermarket lets you to buy only what is on the food pyramid as you have exceeded your junk food quota this month.
When you go to the bank to cash a check you need to get an official override of the optical retina scan because your conjunctivitis gave a false reading.
Your computer screen freezes unless you enter your Real ID number and use “Microsoft Rules The World” as your password.
After scanning the card the dentist says, “ Sign the waiver. You haven't changed your toothbrush in 9 months. We are not responsible for your filling failing.”
I dread when the time comes to restock my undergarments and the clerk asks……..but I won't go there. Some things are better off with less public scrutiny.
END
Thursday, September 21, 2006
9/20/06
A Tale of Two Fiefs
Tri-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
There may be some skeptics who doubt…….. but once in a galaxy far, far away and long, long ago there existed a land called Baldwinia. It had two populated areas. One was Orangio By The Sea (OBTS) and the other its near neighbor Fairtopia. Each was unique.
OBTS was a place where the most people wanted to live by the water. They built many lodgings by the shore and some had multiple dwellings. Soon the shoreline was rife with buildings from huts to castles. The population consisted of many vassals and some vassals were superior to others, these were The Overseers And Developers (TOADs). Now a TOAD had a variety of duties, among which was the requirement to attend the lord mayor at his court, help administer justice, and contribute money if needed (the legal tender was coins made of antler material called bucks). In addition they must take up arms if summoned to battle, bringing a contingent of lawyers to protect the lord mayor . When huts, castles, land, and even whole fiefs became available it was the duty of the TOADs to immediately, in secrecy, notify the lord mayor who then could quietly include his name as one of the buyers for the lordly investments, re-sell it at a higher amount, and pocket the big buck difference. As well, they must feed and house the lord mayor and his company when they traveled . The loyal TOADs in addition maintained the lord mayors moat, castle, fences, and gaming preserve. They made sure that the spoked wheels on his riding rig , the Baldwinia Municipal Wagon (BMW) were the most modern.
On the lord mayor’s side, for reciprocity, he was obliged to protect the vassals, and be instrumental in his high office by vouching for the TOAD's recommendations and pushing for his council’s approval of them. The lord mayor and TOADs reveled in the realm of unlimited growth and its potential. This rule of governing in OBTS was the established way for a long time, until…..but we'll get to that shortly.
Meanwhile in Fairtopia, land of the petal and pistil, the inhabitants were of the more earthy kind who valued planting, tilling, and fertilizing . They preferred modest abodes and opposed developing the towering multi- dwelling hutches of their OBTS neighbors. The lord mayor and council of Fairtopia were known to have spurned potential TOADs when they approached.
The trees, shrubs, bushes, vines, foliage, and flowers were the pride of the populace followed closely by the great citadel of records they were constructing to house the many parchments of written stories and documents of present and past happenings.
Among the court was the small knighted force who drove their wheeled wagons used for keeping the peace along the roads and byways.
There was an instance when a major downpour pushed by high winds during the hot season was going to cause great damage. The lord mayor of Fairtopia could not escort his first dame to a safer area as he did not want to leave his post, so he had one of his knights take her out of the area in a fief coach wagon. All was well after the deluge.
Now to get back to the Orangio By The Sea story……..
It came to pass that a traveling minstrel started imparting in verse the doings of OBTS and posting pamphlets. Something to the effect, “ How did all the bucks get stowed/ in the pockets of the Toads ?/ And where was lord mayor in all this?/ Investigate and then dismiss/ Check the facts and give him the boot / if you find he stashed the loot”.
This cry reached the Grand Doge who was the chief ruler of the entire kingdom of fiefs and who controlled all the treasuries. In due course the OBTS lord mayor and his TOADs were tried, found guilty, and punished for their wrong doings.
The minstrel seeing how influential his verse and pamphlets were, thought that this type of attention should be brought to the lord mayor of Fairtopia because of the ride given by his knight to the first dame during the deluge. The minstrel called out , “ We question the manner of transportation/ for those in office by affirmation/ and seek to chastise who transgress/ just like we did OBTS”
But the people, it seemed, were not moved by this call to action. There were other matters of more import to contend with. And elders recalled the lord mayor of the northern land of Grand Apple, Fiorello, who used to ride fire wagons to the cheers of citizens. Soon the matter was forgotten.
The morals: 1. Sometimes ill-gotten bucks can trample TOADs 2. A cry for justice should be in proportion to the allegation or you can't create a tempest in a vassal which can't hold water.
*Personal Note: This column marks the first anniversary of the launch of TRI-O’S. My thanks for all the encouragements (you know who you are).
To Folks out of town: 1. On Sept. 1, 2006 the former (resigned) mayor of Orange Beach, City Attorney and developers were convicted by a federal court jury of fraud and related charges in a real estate scheme in the Gulf Coast resort. 2. Before hurricanes Ivan and Katrina, the Fairhope Mayor had a police officer drive his wife to catch a flight out of Pensacola . The Mayor's use of police drivers came under question on the front page.
A Tale of Two Fiefs
Tri-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
There may be some skeptics who doubt…….. but once in a galaxy far, far away and long, long ago there existed a land called Baldwinia. It had two populated areas. One was Orangio By The Sea (OBTS) and the other its near neighbor Fairtopia. Each was unique.
OBTS was a place where the most people wanted to live by the water. They built many lodgings by the shore and some had multiple dwellings. Soon the shoreline was rife with buildings from huts to castles. The population consisted of many vassals and some vassals were superior to others, these were The Overseers And Developers (TOADs). Now a TOAD had a variety of duties, among which was the requirement to attend the lord mayor at his court, help administer justice, and contribute money if needed (the legal tender was coins made of antler material called bucks). In addition they must take up arms if summoned to battle, bringing a contingent of lawyers to protect the lord mayor . When huts, castles, land, and even whole fiefs became available it was the duty of the TOADs to immediately, in secrecy, notify the lord mayor who then could quietly include his name as one of the buyers for the lordly investments, re-sell it at a higher amount, and pocket the big buck difference. As well, they must feed and house the lord mayor and his company when they traveled . The loyal TOADs in addition maintained the lord mayors moat, castle, fences, and gaming preserve. They made sure that the spoked wheels on his riding rig , the Baldwinia Municipal Wagon (BMW) were the most modern.
On the lord mayor’s side, for reciprocity, he was obliged to protect the vassals, and be instrumental in his high office by vouching for the TOAD's recommendations and pushing for his council’s approval of them. The lord mayor and TOADs reveled in the realm of unlimited growth and its potential. This rule of governing in OBTS was the established way for a long time, until…..but we'll get to that shortly.
Meanwhile in Fairtopia, land of the petal and pistil, the inhabitants were of the more earthy kind who valued planting, tilling, and fertilizing . They preferred modest abodes and opposed developing the towering multi- dwelling hutches of their OBTS neighbors. The lord mayor and council of Fairtopia were known to have spurned potential TOADs when they approached.
The trees, shrubs, bushes, vines, foliage, and flowers were the pride of the populace followed closely by the great citadel of records they were constructing to house the many parchments of written stories and documents of present and past happenings.
Among the court was the small knighted force who drove their wheeled wagons used for keeping the peace along the roads and byways.
There was an instance when a major downpour pushed by high winds during the hot season was going to cause great damage. The lord mayor of Fairtopia could not escort his first dame to a safer area as he did not want to leave his post, so he had one of his knights take her out of the area in a fief coach wagon. All was well after the deluge.
Now to get back to the Orangio By The Sea story……..
It came to pass that a traveling minstrel started imparting in verse the doings of OBTS and posting pamphlets. Something to the effect, “ How did all the bucks get stowed/ in the pockets of the Toads ?/ And where was lord mayor in all this?/ Investigate and then dismiss/ Check the facts and give him the boot / if you find he stashed the loot”.
This cry reached the Grand Doge who was the chief ruler of the entire kingdom of fiefs and who controlled all the treasuries. In due course the OBTS lord mayor and his TOADs were tried, found guilty, and punished for their wrong doings.
The minstrel seeing how influential his verse and pamphlets were, thought that this type of attention should be brought to the lord mayor of Fairtopia because of the ride given by his knight to the first dame during the deluge. The minstrel called out , “ We question the manner of transportation/ for those in office by affirmation/ and seek to chastise who transgress/ just like we did OBTS”
But the people, it seemed, were not moved by this call to action. There were other matters of more import to contend with. And elders recalled the lord mayor of the northern land of Grand Apple, Fiorello, who used to ride fire wagons to the cheers of citizens. Soon the matter was forgotten.
The morals: 1. Sometimes ill-gotten bucks can trample TOADs 2. A cry for justice should be in proportion to the allegation or you can't create a tempest in a vassal which can't hold water.
*Personal Note: This column marks the first anniversary of the launch of TRI-O’S. My thanks for all the encouragements (you know who you are).
To Folks out of town: 1. On Sept. 1, 2006 the former (resigned) mayor of Orange Beach, City Attorney and developers were convicted by a federal court jury of fraud and related charges in a real estate scheme in the Gulf Coast resort. 2. Before hurricanes Ivan and Katrina, the Fairhope Mayor had a police officer drive his wife to catch a flight out of Pensacola . The Mayor's use of police drivers came under question on the front page.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
9/9/06
A Gallery Of Rogues
TRI-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
Rogue waves are enormous waves that undulate and swell on the ocean, they are also called freak or monster waves. A seven-story one emerged off the coast of Georgia on April 16, 2005. According to the New York Times “It crashed into the bow, sent deck chairs flying, smashed windows, raced as high as the 10th deck, flooded 62 cabins, injured 4 passengers and sowed widespread fear and panic.” One passenger compared the ship being like a “cork in a bathtub”. Kind of reminds one of the 1974 movie “The Poseidon Adventure”
This got me wondering about different rogue species - objects of nature, imagination, and others. There was the hybrid plant creation of a Venus flytrap which develops a nasty craving for human blood in “Little Shop of Horrors”. And in “The Attack of the Killer Tomatoes” no one was safe from the rolling red spheres. When he traded the milk cow for the magic beans Jack never thought that those rogue beans would provide the means for him to climb to the heavens to meet the Giant which almost cost him his life. The placid St. Bernard, Cujo, became a monster when Stephen King turned him into a rabid rogue dog. Even the universe has a rogue, on Star Trek Enterprise the crew visited a rogue planet and discovered an alien ship on board (astronomers have even ousted Pluto from the planet category…… how roguish of that asteroid posing as a planet!).
Ways were found to cope with most rogues; the wave (ride it out) , the tomato (eat it before it eats you), and the dog (vaccinate him), but how do we act in response to rogue nations?
The word ROGUE is defined as “An unprincipled, deceitful, and unreliable person; a scoundrel or rascal“. Iran’s violations of the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty, to which they are a signatory, setting Aug. 31 as the deadline for suspending nuclear enrichment clearly makes them one. They are emboldened by three factors 1. That Russia and China will want a diplomatic approach and not sanctions (recall the “Peace in our time” negotiation charade with Hitler before WW2 ?) 2. That the U.S. has too much on its plate in Iraq and Afghanistan 3. That the perception is that Hezbollah bested Israel.
According to the New York Times “On Friday, a midlevel cleric, Ahmad Khatami, said during a Friday Prayer ceremony that the West ought to be cautious in the way it addressed Iran ‘You cannot use the language of force against this nation,’ Mr. Khatami said in a speech broadcast around the nation from central Tehran. ‘Do not test us as you have tested us before‘” . This is the same as brazenly putting a chip on your shoulder and daring someone to knock it off.
They say all they want to do is to have the ability to independently make nuclear fuel and use it to generate electricity. Right!! They are sitting on one of the worlds largest seas of oil capable of such generation. Why go for the nuclear? Q. Why is it reported that the area surrounding the nuclear facilities is being populated with civilians? A. To discourage strikes there in order to avoid world outrage against collateral deaths and casualties.
Mr. Ahmadinejad , Iran’s president, said that Iran was not a threat for any country, even Israel. Right again!! After they stated that Israel should be wiped off the map.
This war waged by terrorists is not new it started in 1979 when Iranian radical students seized the U.S. embassy, taking 66 hostages. From 1982-1991 in Lebanon 30 US and other Western hostages were kidnapped ( remember Terry Anderson?) In 1983 in Beirut a truck bomb killed 241 marines. In 1984 an explosion outside the U.S. embassy killed 24. During 1985 there was an airline hijacking, restaurant bombings, a ship attack, and airport bombings.1986 Athens and West Berlin experienced bomb attacks. In 1988 the Pan-Am Lockerbie flight explosion killed all 259 aboard. In the basement garage of the New York World Trade Center in 1993 a car bomb killed six and injured over 1,000. During 1995 and 1996 Saudi Arabia had two car bombings at U.S. military headquarters, killing 24 U.S. military servicemen and injuring hundreds. U.S. embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were truck bomb victims in 1998 killing 224 injuring about 4,500. In 2000 U.S. Navy destroyer USS Cole was heavily damaged when a small boat blew up alongside it, 17 sailors killed. Then on 9/11/01 2 commercial jets hijackers smashed into twin towers of the World Trade Center; 2 more hijacked jets were crashed into the Pentagon and in rural Pa. Total dead and missing numbered 2,9921.
Terrorist acts continue to this day and in the final analysis there may be no compromise with a fanatic sect who prize “martyr” death over life, and it may be left to Israel alone to seriously consider a preemptive strike similar to the 1981 one that destroyed Iraq's reactor when that rogue nation threatened potential nuclear world destruction..
A Gallery Of Rogues
TRI-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
Rogue waves are enormous waves that undulate and swell on the ocean, they are also called freak or monster waves. A seven-story one emerged off the coast of Georgia on April 16, 2005. According to the New York Times “It crashed into the bow, sent deck chairs flying, smashed windows, raced as high as the 10th deck, flooded 62 cabins, injured 4 passengers and sowed widespread fear and panic.” One passenger compared the ship being like a “cork in a bathtub”. Kind of reminds one of the 1974 movie “The Poseidon Adventure”
This got me wondering about different rogue species - objects of nature, imagination, and others. There was the hybrid plant creation of a Venus flytrap which develops a nasty craving for human blood in “Little Shop of Horrors”. And in “The Attack of the Killer Tomatoes” no one was safe from the rolling red spheres. When he traded the milk cow for the magic beans Jack never thought that those rogue beans would provide the means for him to climb to the heavens to meet the Giant which almost cost him his life. The placid St. Bernard, Cujo, became a monster when Stephen King turned him into a rabid rogue dog. Even the universe has a rogue, on Star Trek Enterprise the crew visited a rogue planet and discovered an alien ship on board (astronomers have even ousted Pluto from the planet category…… how roguish of that asteroid posing as a planet!).
Ways were found to cope with most rogues; the wave (ride it out) , the tomato (eat it before it eats you), and the dog (vaccinate him), but how do we act in response to rogue nations?
The word ROGUE is defined as “An unprincipled, deceitful, and unreliable person; a scoundrel or rascal“. Iran’s violations of the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty, to which they are a signatory, setting Aug. 31 as the deadline for suspending nuclear enrichment clearly makes them one. They are emboldened by three factors 1. That Russia and China will want a diplomatic approach and not sanctions (recall the “Peace in our time” negotiation charade with Hitler before WW2 ?) 2. That the U.S. has too much on its plate in Iraq and Afghanistan 3. That the perception is that Hezbollah bested Israel.
According to the New York Times “On Friday, a midlevel cleric, Ahmad Khatami, said during a Friday Prayer ceremony that the West ought to be cautious in the way it addressed Iran ‘You cannot use the language of force against this nation,’ Mr. Khatami said in a speech broadcast around the nation from central Tehran. ‘Do not test us as you have tested us before‘” . This is the same as brazenly putting a chip on your shoulder and daring someone to knock it off.
They say all they want to do is to have the ability to independently make nuclear fuel and use it to generate electricity. Right!! They are sitting on one of the worlds largest seas of oil capable of such generation. Why go for the nuclear? Q. Why is it reported that the area surrounding the nuclear facilities is being populated with civilians? A. To discourage strikes there in order to avoid world outrage against collateral deaths and casualties.
Mr. Ahmadinejad , Iran’s president, said that Iran was not a threat for any country, even Israel. Right again!! After they stated that Israel should be wiped off the map.
This war waged by terrorists is not new it started in 1979 when Iranian radical students seized the U.S. embassy, taking 66 hostages. From 1982-1991 in Lebanon 30 US and other Western hostages were kidnapped ( remember Terry Anderson?) In 1983 in Beirut a truck bomb killed 241 marines. In 1984 an explosion outside the U.S. embassy killed 24. During 1985 there was an airline hijacking, restaurant bombings, a ship attack, and airport bombings.1986 Athens and West Berlin experienced bomb attacks. In 1988 the Pan-Am Lockerbie flight explosion killed all 259 aboard. In the basement garage of the New York World Trade Center in 1993 a car bomb killed six and injured over 1,000. During 1995 and 1996 Saudi Arabia had two car bombings at U.S. military headquarters, killing 24 U.S. military servicemen and injuring hundreds. U.S. embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were truck bomb victims in 1998 killing 224 injuring about 4,500. In 2000 U.S. Navy destroyer USS Cole was heavily damaged when a small boat blew up alongside it, 17 sailors killed. Then on 9/11/01 2 commercial jets hijackers smashed into twin towers of the World Trade Center; 2 more hijacked jets were crashed into the Pentagon and in rural Pa. Total dead and missing numbered 2,9921.
Terrorist acts continue to this day and in the final analysis there may be no compromise with a fanatic sect who prize “martyr” death over life, and it may be left to Israel alone to seriously consider a preemptive strike similar to the 1981 one that destroyed Iraq's reactor when that rogue nation threatened potential nuclear world destruction..
Thursday, August 24, 2006
8/26/06
Three Thoughts on a Summer's Eve
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
Who won?
The question asked was: name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends ? (answer below).
A similar type question can be posed now in regard to the recent conflict in Lebanon and Israel. Although far from being a sport the war’s outcome is yet to be known by the world spectators or the combatant forces.
The Israelis claim to have seriously hobbled the Hezbollah guerrillas and the Hezbollah boast that they have beaten the “invincible” Israel Defense Force. It seems, according to media reports , that the Hezzies have the PR upper hand in that they are dispensing millions of crisp new U.S. bills with Ben Franklin’s likeness to those Lebanese claimants who have lost relatives and property as a result of the fighting. The state within a State is being supplied this cash by Iranian and Syrian oil revenues (another reason to seek alternative fuel sources and increase current U.S. oil drilling). You may remember the history about the times when Tammany Hall politicians in New York City achieved all their long lasting power by vote buying. More recently the FEMA admitted handing out payments to unwarranted Katrina victims. I'm sure the Katrina money recipients will not be influenced when it comes to their vote but the same can not be said of the Lebanese.
(Answer . . . Boxing)
Artist redux
Franz Schubert: died at the age of thirty-one. Schubert wrote more than 600 songs and musical pieces and he was not fully appreciated while he lived. In fact most of his important symphonies were not performed during his lifetime.
Emily Dickinson: wrote nearly 1,800 poems, very few were published during her lifetime, and those were published anonymously. She was considered as an eccentric because she always wore white and never left her home grounds.
Vincent van Gogh: had only a 10-year artistic career but produced more than 800 paintings and 700 drawings, of which he sold only one in his lifetime.
Why, you may ask, do I mention the above three who had a prodigious artistic output yet were not recognized during the times in which they lived? Of late much has been commented about the artist Nall. It seems controversy follows him. Deserved? Perhaps. This is not meant to compare him with the same reverence as the above artists…. yet, ( he is very much alive, productive, and prominent in international circles) but some others, now recognized icons, too were also thought to be out of the “mainstream” at one time. Now I'm just a guy with no formal training in the arts but with an appreciation for what pleases the eye and other senses and which trigger thinking. He is, to me, a visionary with the imagination, talent, and intelligence. It seems that at times a rush to judgment is best abandoned to let the patina of time decide.
(http://www.nall.org/)
The Second Date
My friend Sy got his second date two weeks ago. Those of us now reading this do not have the second date. The first date was the day on which we were born.
This is not meant to sound morose but rather it is a commemoration and remembrance of a special friend’s life. We all have that certain friend who knows us almost better than we do ourselves. Shared life experiences and adventures that no one except the two of you have gone through (and though miles may separate ) that live in the hard wired drive in our memory. From early school days, to coming of age, through adulthood, starting careers and families, maturing , and watching the next generations growth. These events are what we share and are each unique unto themselves.
Sy was a person you could count on to do what he said he was going to do. Loyalty was his middle name. Some confused his pragmatism with cynicism but he had a distinct knack of cutting through pretense and hype, whatever their source, and expressing his take on it. His humor was of the David Letterman sort, i.e., he “put on” a straight face as he toyed with the life’s situations and then the “eureka” moment hit you as the “now I get it” phase dawned. His wife, three sons, family, and friends are all the more richer for having him as part of their lives , we will miss him. Seymour Beck now has his second date - August 10, 2006. Fare well, old friend.
Three Thoughts on a Summer's Eve
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
Who won?
The question asked was: name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends ? (answer below).
A similar type question can be posed now in regard to the recent conflict in Lebanon and Israel. Although far from being a sport the war’s outcome is yet to be known by the world spectators or the combatant forces.
The Israelis claim to have seriously hobbled the Hezbollah guerrillas and the Hezbollah boast that they have beaten the “invincible” Israel Defense Force. It seems, according to media reports , that the Hezzies have the PR upper hand in that they are dispensing millions of crisp new U.S. bills with Ben Franklin’s likeness to those Lebanese claimants who have lost relatives and property as a result of the fighting. The state within a State is being supplied this cash by Iranian and Syrian oil revenues (another reason to seek alternative fuel sources and increase current U.S. oil drilling). You may remember the history about the times when Tammany Hall politicians in New York City achieved all their long lasting power by vote buying. More recently the FEMA admitted handing out payments to unwarranted Katrina victims. I'm sure the Katrina money recipients will not be influenced when it comes to their vote but the same can not be said of the Lebanese.
(Answer . . . Boxing)
Artist redux
Franz Schubert: died at the age of thirty-one. Schubert wrote more than 600 songs and musical pieces and he was not fully appreciated while he lived. In fact most of his important symphonies were not performed during his lifetime.
Emily Dickinson: wrote nearly 1,800 poems, very few were published during her lifetime, and those were published anonymously. She was considered as an eccentric because she always wore white and never left her home grounds.
Vincent van Gogh: had only a 10-year artistic career but produced more than 800 paintings and 700 drawings, of which he sold only one in his lifetime.
Why, you may ask, do I mention the above three who had a prodigious artistic output yet were not recognized during the times in which they lived? Of late much has been commented about the artist Nall. It seems controversy follows him. Deserved? Perhaps. This is not meant to compare him with the same reverence as the above artists…. yet, ( he is very much alive, productive, and prominent in international circles) but some others, now recognized icons, too were also thought to be out of the “mainstream” at one time. Now I'm just a guy with no formal training in the arts but with an appreciation for what pleases the eye and other senses and which trigger thinking. He is, to me, a visionary with the imagination, talent, and intelligence. It seems that at times a rush to judgment is best abandoned to let the patina of time decide.
(http://www.nall.org/)
The Second Date
My friend Sy got his second date two weeks ago. Those of us now reading this do not have the second date. The first date was the day on which we were born.
This is not meant to sound morose but rather it is a commemoration and remembrance of a special friend’s life. We all have that certain friend who knows us almost better than we do ourselves. Shared life experiences and adventures that no one except the two of you have gone through (and though miles may separate ) that live in the hard wired drive in our memory. From early school days, to coming of age, through adulthood, starting careers and families, maturing , and watching the next generations growth. These events are what we share and are each unique unto themselves.
Sy was a person you could count on to do what he said he was going to do. Loyalty was his middle name. Some confused his pragmatism with cynicism but he had a distinct knack of cutting through pretense and hype, whatever their source, and expressing his take on it. His humor was of the David Letterman sort, i.e., he “put on” a straight face as he toyed with the life’s situations and then the “eureka” moment hit you as the “now I get it” phase dawned. His wife, three sons, family, and friends are all the more richer for having him as part of their lives , we will miss him. Seymour Beck now has his second date - August 10, 2006. Fare well, old friend.
8/9/06
The Nearness of Them
Tri-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
She never saw it coming. She was not expecting it and it came as a total surprise. There she was sitting quietly at the impressive round table where to her left and right were other leaders of nations. Then Germany's first female Chancellor, Angela Merkel, started speaking with Italian Prime Minister Romano Prodi at the G-8 Summit near St. Petersburg a few weeks ago when President George W. Bush approaches Merkel from behind and gives her a squeeze on her shoulders and then a slight flexing massage maneuver. The video of it was widely shown on TV and numerous web sites. It then shows Merkel hunching her shoulders and flinging her arms up in a gesture to stop the impromptu massage. Her expression is one of “Can this really be happening?”
Not seeking the guise of a political pundit there is no need to delve into the worldwide ramifications of this “laying on of hands” incident as to how it played out in other countries but let’s take a look at where boundaries lie both here and elsewhere.
The study of this measureable distances interaction between people is called proxemics and was introduced by anthropologist Edward T, Hall in 1963. These relate to body spacing and posture that are unintentional (the body language). According to Wikipedia
“Hall pointed out that social distance between people is reliably correlated with physical distance, and described four distances:
intimate distance for embracing, touching or whispering ( 6-18 inches)
personal distance for interactions among good friends ( 1.5-4 feet)
social distance for interactions among acquaintances ( 4-12 ft)
public distance used for public speaking (over 12 ft) “
We human beings are territorial animals and like to protect and control our space, as do other animal species. Remember the time you re-entered a class or meeting and found someone sitting in “your” seat? You’re sitting at your desk when a co-worker or boss enters your office without knocking ….how do you feel? And what if you saw your co-worker checking out your desk drawer?
When our space is “invaded” by people who are not aware of these zones and the meanings attached to them the result is tension and suspicion. You’re in an elevator, bus, or movie theater when the stranger at your side inadvertently touches you. Wham! Your own bubble of space has been invaded and you begin to feel uncomfortable, possibly resentful, perhaps belligerent, maybe even challenged. But if you were in a another part of the world personal zones are viewed differently. Different cultures = different distance zones. Whereas we in the U.S., Northern Europeans, and Asians favor the Social Zone (about 4 feet) and little physical contact, Arab, Latin, and Mediterranean cultures are more the “in your face” Intimate and Personal Zone people. Recall when President Bush and Crown Prince Abdullah held hands walking into their meeting in Texas after their greeting with cheek kisses? These actions prompted questions and raised eyebrows about two men showing that kind of physical intimacy but White House sources quickly explained “hand-holding is an Arab expression of ‘friendship, respect and trust.’” These were also political gestures, to perhaps become more ingratiating to the visitor and allow the oil to continue to flow. On the other hand there have been many “ugly American” stereotypes as we were considered “aloof” and “stand-offish” as we backed away from those with whom we were conversing as they attempted to decrease the distance between.
So maybe the president was merely attempting to show more camaraderie, playfulness, and commonality in a more “touching” manner, but almost any thinking male today knows he may be inviting a sexual harassment suit by giving an uninvited massage to any female in our culture. And it has been noted by others that the president should keep in mind that the G-8 Summit is not to be mistaken for Yale’s Delta Kappa Epsilon.
The Nearness of Them
Tri-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
She never saw it coming. She was not expecting it and it came as a total surprise. There she was sitting quietly at the impressive round table where to her left and right were other leaders of nations. Then Germany's first female Chancellor, Angela Merkel, started speaking with Italian Prime Minister Romano Prodi at the G-8 Summit near St. Petersburg a few weeks ago when President George W. Bush approaches Merkel from behind and gives her a squeeze on her shoulders and then a slight flexing massage maneuver. The video of it was widely shown on TV and numerous web sites. It then shows Merkel hunching her shoulders and flinging her arms up in a gesture to stop the impromptu massage. Her expression is one of “Can this really be happening?”
Not seeking the guise of a political pundit there is no need to delve into the worldwide ramifications of this “laying on of hands” incident as to how it played out in other countries but let’s take a look at where boundaries lie both here and elsewhere.
The study of this measureable distances interaction between people is called proxemics and was introduced by anthropologist Edward T, Hall in 1963. These relate to body spacing and posture that are unintentional (the body language). According to Wikipedia
“Hall pointed out that social distance between people is reliably correlated with physical distance, and described four distances:
intimate distance for embracing, touching or whispering ( 6-18 inches)
personal distance for interactions among good friends ( 1.5-4 feet)
social distance for interactions among acquaintances ( 4-12 ft)
public distance used for public speaking (over 12 ft) “
We human beings are territorial animals and like to protect and control our space, as do other animal species. Remember the time you re-entered a class or meeting and found someone sitting in “your” seat? You’re sitting at your desk when a co-worker or boss enters your office without knocking ….how do you feel? And what if you saw your co-worker checking out your desk drawer?
When our space is “invaded” by people who are not aware of these zones and the meanings attached to them the result is tension and suspicion. You’re in an elevator, bus, or movie theater when the stranger at your side inadvertently touches you. Wham! Your own bubble of space has been invaded and you begin to feel uncomfortable, possibly resentful, perhaps belligerent, maybe even challenged. But if you were in a another part of the world personal zones are viewed differently. Different cultures = different distance zones. Whereas we in the U.S., Northern Europeans, and Asians favor the Social Zone (about 4 feet) and little physical contact, Arab, Latin, and Mediterranean cultures are more the “in your face” Intimate and Personal Zone people. Recall when President Bush and Crown Prince Abdullah held hands walking into their meeting in Texas after their greeting with cheek kisses? These actions prompted questions and raised eyebrows about two men showing that kind of physical intimacy but White House sources quickly explained “hand-holding is an Arab expression of ‘friendship, respect and trust.’” These were also political gestures, to perhaps become more ingratiating to the visitor and allow the oil to continue to flow. On the other hand there have been many “ugly American” stereotypes as we were considered “aloof” and “stand-offish” as we backed away from those with whom we were conversing as they attempted to decrease the distance between.
So maybe the president was merely attempting to show more camaraderie, playfulness, and commonality in a more “touching” manner, but almost any thinking male today knows he may be inviting a sexual harassment suit by giving an uninvited massage to any female in our culture. And it has been noted by others that the president should keep in mind that the G-8 Summit is not to be mistaken for Yale’s Delta Kappa Epsilon.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
7/29/06
CLAWS- The Movie
Tri-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
These past two weeks have given us a lot of heavy news……. war in Israel and Lebanon, continued death tolls in Iraq, tsunami in Indonesia, floods up north, wildfires in the west, record breaking heat in the continental U.S.. For a few moments let’s consider a lighter aspect of what is going on around here. Let’s go to a movie.
If you listen carefully at first you can almost detect the faint thumping bass. Yes, the sounds are getting more distinct as the bikini clad silhouette comes into focus. Soon their throbbing rhythm becomes ominous as the greenish brown object gradually fills the screen and the bikini babe begins to look like bait as she is viewed between the big open claw of the giant lobster. Fade screen to black and then red. We’re watching the next summer big hit, “CLAWS“. Maybe even directed by Steven Spielberg. But wait…..it may not be a movie based on fiction but a documentary based on fact (albeit science-fiction at this point) if the Lobster Liberation Front (LLF) has its way.
They claim when you put the live lobsters into a pot of boiling water they (the lobsters) feel pain and therefore it is inhumane. The LLF may want a law such as in Reggio, Italy where boiling lobsters alive is illegal and offenders can be fined up to $600. Some chefs here do dispatch the creatures to the great seaweed in the sky prior to dunking them in the boiling brine.
The LLF wants to return all the captured lobsters now residing in all those tanks in restaurants and supermarkets back to the ocean (sans rubber bands binding their claws) and then leave them alone.
Carrying forward Darwin’s theory of survival of the fittest and natural selection over many lobster generations, and perhaps a mutation or two, our denizen of the deep might then indeed have evolved into this killer crustacean we may see on the screen. Ouch!
Let’s go back to the pain factor: in Norway scientists investigated pain, discomfort and stress in invertebrates (including crabs and live worms on a fish hook) and state that the answer is NO (let’s hope this is not like the “painless dentist” joke). None of these creatures feel a thing, they say. Which is good news for Norwegian fishermen because Norway's fishing industry is large and, needless to say, influential. The small Norwegian lobster is the third most valuable commercial species in the North Sea. One wonders if there could have been a hint of bias, but we will never know.
They go on to state “crabs and lobsters have only about 100,000 neurons, compared with 100 billion in people and other vertebrates (ever wonder who counted them?-italics, mine). While this allows them to react to threatening stimuli, there is no evidence they feel pain.”
Another study at the University of Wyoming, conducted on questions of neurology for almost 30 years, concluded “that awareness of pain depends on functions of specific regions of the cerebral which fish do not possess.” In other words their brains are not developed enough to allow them to feel pain or sense fear. But if you were Shirley MacLaine and believed you were to be re-incarnated I’ll bet your choice would not be to come back as a lobster or a trout.
What’s a former lover of lobster, who is now a member of the LLF to do? How about mock lobster? Its main ingredients are potatoes, corn, green peas, and flour.
I don’t know but it all sounds fishy to me and I’d still rather the real thing as I say “Please pass the drawn butter.”
*********************************************************************
UPDATE: From Tri-O’s 1/18/06 ““Riverwalk Orange Beach” should rethink its name. It’s acronym sounds suspect.”
Press Release 6/30/06- “Riverwalk in Orange Beach has been renamed Bama Bayou, developers of the project on the Intracoastal Waterway announced Thursday”
CLAWS- The Movie
Tri-O's
oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
These past two weeks have given us a lot of heavy news……. war in Israel and Lebanon, continued death tolls in Iraq, tsunami in Indonesia, floods up north, wildfires in the west, record breaking heat in the continental U.S.. For a few moments let’s consider a lighter aspect of what is going on around here. Let’s go to a movie.
If you listen carefully at first you can almost detect the faint thumping bass. Yes, the sounds are getting more distinct as the bikini clad silhouette comes into focus. Soon their throbbing rhythm becomes ominous as the greenish brown object gradually fills the screen and the bikini babe begins to look like bait as she is viewed between the big open claw of the giant lobster. Fade screen to black and then red. We’re watching the next summer big hit, “CLAWS“. Maybe even directed by Steven Spielberg. But wait…..it may not be a movie based on fiction but a documentary based on fact (albeit science-fiction at this point) if the Lobster Liberation Front (LLF) has its way.
They claim when you put the live lobsters into a pot of boiling water they (the lobsters) feel pain and therefore it is inhumane. The LLF may want a law such as in Reggio, Italy where boiling lobsters alive is illegal and offenders can be fined up to $600. Some chefs here do dispatch the creatures to the great seaweed in the sky prior to dunking them in the boiling brine.
The LLF wants to return all the captured lobsters now residing in all those tanks in restaurants and supermarkets back to the ocean (sans rubber bands binding their claws) and then leave them alone.
Carrying forward Darwin’s theory of survival of the fittest and natural selection over many lobster generations, and perhaps a mutation or two, our denizen of the deep might then indeed have evolved into this killer crustacean we may see on the screen. Ouch!
Let’s go back to the pain factor: in Norway scientists investigated pain, discomfort and stress in invertebrates (including crabs and live worms on a fish hook) and state that the answer is NO (let’s hope this is not like the “painless dentist” joke). None of these creatures feel a thing, they say. Which is good news for Norwegian fishermen because Norway's fishing industry is large and, needless to say, influential. The small Norwegian lobster is the third most valuable commercial species in the North Sea. One wonders if there could have been a hint of bias, but we will never know.
They go on to state “crabs and lobsters have only about 100,000 neurons, compared with 100 billion in people and other vertebrates (ever wonder who counted them?-italics, mine). While this allows them to react to threatening stimuli, there is no evidence they feel pain.”
Another study at the University of Wyoming, conducted on questions of neurology for almost 30 years, concluded “that awareness of pain depends on functions of specific regions of the cerebral which fish do not possess.” In other words their brains are not developed enough to allow them to feel pain or sense fear. But if you were Shirley MacLaine and believed you were to be re-incarnated I’ll bet your choice would not be to come back as a lobster or a trout.
What’s a former lover of lobster, who is now a member of the LLF to do? How about mock lobster? Its main ingredients are potatoes, corn, green peas, and flour.
I don’t know but it all sounds fishy to me and I’d still rather the real thing as I say “Please pass the drawn butter.”
*********************************************************************
UPDATE: From Tri-O’s 1/18/06 ““Riverwalk Orange Beach” should rethink its name. It’s acronym sounds suspect.”
Press Release 6/30/06- “Riverwalk in Orange Beach has been renamed Bama Bayou, developers of the project on the Intracoastal Waterway announced Thursday”
Friday, July 14, 2006
7/12/06
From : ) to : (
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
Who would have thunk it ? As you read this a battle is being waged whose outcome will be ruled on in the next few months by the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office. The widely recognized smiley face in the Wal-Mart ads may be in jeopardy. What will the sons of Sam do? They are being challenged by a French family who claims that they originated the face made of punctuation marks in 1971.
However the person who first conceived the smiley face is acknowledged to be
Harvey R. Ball. In 1963, it was he who devised the smiley yellow button for a Massachusetts company, State Mutual Life Assurance Company . For this Mr. Ball, a graphic artist, was paid $45. He never trademarked it. ( Sorry to disappoint all the Forrest Gump fans who thought Forrest did this by a fortuitous wiping of his dirty face on a yellow t-shirt.). It seems that under the U.S. trademark system the first to register a trademark is not as important in the ownership as is the first enterprise who utilizes and takes full advantage of the symbol. This legal tug-of-war continues as Wal-Mart contends that the icon is public domain and has given it wide retail exposure since 1996. So let the grins fall where they may as we hold our breath to see who comes up smiling.
The above got me to thinking how various personalities might have commented on this smiley face saga. Let’s make some conjectures (with apologies to all):
William Shakespeare: “To smile, or not to smile: that is the question:Whether 'tis nobler in the store to suffer the slings and mask of Zorro, or to take arms against a sea of Jacques Chiracs, and by opposing end them. To chance to vanish , to be erased; aye, there's the rub.”Herman Melville: "Call me Ish-smiley, for I too will cling to the leviathan called pop-culture. ”
Charles Dickens: "It was the best of smiles, it was the worst of smiles, it was the age of hip, it was the age of hop, it was the epoch of bling-bling , it was the epoch of phat, but was it the time to pay the piper?“
Margaret Mitchell: "Goldie O'Hara was not beautiful, but men seldom realized it when caught by her infectious wide sunny smile.“
J. D. Salinger: "If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is, where I was drawn, and what my lousy design was like, and all that Mickey Mouse kind of crap, but I won’t.”
Ernest Hemingway: “ Maybe the French got there first. But for whom does the bell toll when frowny face needs the oval and the “C” for a mouth? You’ll know soon enough, brother.”
James Michener: “Smiley was conceived from the tip of a rod of Chinese graphite embedded in the core of a #2 cadmium colored pencil honed from the over fifty year old red cedar tree grown in north Alabama.”
Stephen King: “ When he looked in the mirror all he saw were the period eyes. Where was the close parentheses mouth? Then the misty cloud began seeping in from beneath the French door.”
Bill Clinton: (chuckle) “ It depends on who’s smiling.”
Al Gore to W: “ See that smiley face slithering down the table-top like Dali’s melting watch? Tell me that’s not the effect of global warming.” W: “Heck of a story Aley boy, but you know that it was caused by Iraqi ‘new-cue-lar’ [sic] WMD.”
Will Rogers: “Ownership makes no never mind, I never met a smile I didn’t like.”
Jesse Jackson: “ Whoa, whoa, this is not legal until the rainbow smiley face is represented”
Martin Luther King Jr.: ” I dreamed you judged smiley by the content of his circle rather that the context of his ink color or origin.”
Pat Robertson: “ Smileys are much too happy and self-absorbed. They must be gay.”
Rush Limbaugh: “I hold here, in my formerly nicotine stained fingers (sound of paper rattling ), and with half my brain tied behind my back, the report by the pinko drive by media admitting that John Kerry and the Democrats leaked the smiley face to the French.”
Al Franken: “ Rush Limbaugh is a big half brained idiot who puts on a smiley face every time he takes a blue pill.”
Bill O’Reilly: “ I’ll give you the last word to opine about the other big ‘O’ as long as the pithiness does not spin here. And check my web site to see what’s for sale.”
Bruce Springsteen: “Smiley was born in the U.S.A/ was born in the U.S.A./ they put a pencil in my hand/ sent me off to a foreign land/ to go and draw the yellow brand.”
50 Cent: “Yo Bro/ Smiley face/ no one ‘gonna take your place/ Wal-Mart ‘gotcha ina store/ Frenchie never get no more.”
Paris Hilton: “Smiley who?”
From : ) to : (
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
Who would have thunk it ? As you read this a battle is being waged whose outcome will be ruled on in the next few months by the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office. The widely recognized smiley face in the Wal-Mart ads may be in jeopardy. What will the sons of Sam do? They are being challenged by a French family who claims that they originated the face made of punctuation marks in 1971.
However the person who first conceived the smiley face is acknowledged to be
Harvey R. Ball. In 1963, it was he who devised the smiley yellow button for a Massachusetts company, State Mutual Life Assurance Company . For this Mr. Ball, a graphic artist, was paid $45. He never trademarked it. ( Sorry to disappoint all the Forrest Gump fans who thought Forrest did this by a fortuitous wiping of his dirty face on a yellow t-shirt.). It seems that under the U.S. trademark system the first to register a trademark is not as important in the ownership as is the first enterprise who utilizes and takes full advantage of the symbol. This legal tug-of-war continues as Wal-Mart contends that the icon is public domain and has given it wide retail exposure since 1996. So let the grins fall where they may as we hold our breath to see who comes up smiling.
The above got me to thinking how various personalities might have commented on this smiley face saga. Let’s make some conjectures (with apologies to all):
William Shakespeare: “To smile, or not to smile: that is the question:Whether 'tis nobler in the store to suffer the slings and mask of Zorro, or to take arms against a sea of Jacques Chiracs, and by opposing end them. To chance to vanish , to be erased; aye, there's the rub.”Herman Melville: "Call me Ish-smiley, for I too will cling to the leviathan called pop-culture. ”
Charles Dickens: "It was the best of smiles, it was the worst of smiles, it was the age of hip, it was the age of hop, it was the epoch of bling-bling , it was the epoch of phat, but was it the time to pay the piper?“
Margaret Mitchell: "Goldie O'Hara was not beautiful, but men seldom realized it when caught by her infectious wide sunny smile.“
J. D. Salinger: "If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is, where I was drawn, and what my lousy design was like, and all that Mickey Mouse kind of crap, but I won’t.”
Ernest Hemingway: “ Maybe the French got there first. But for whom does the bell toll when frowny face needs the oval and the “C” for a mouth? You’ll know soon enough, brother.”
James Michener: “Smiley was conceived from the tip of a rod of Chinese graphite embedded in the core of a #2 cadmium colored pencil honed from the over fifty year old red cedar tree grown in north Alabama.”
Stephen King: “ When he looked in the mirror all he saw were the period eyes. Where was the close parentheses mouth? Then the misty cloud began seeping in from beneath the French door.”
Bill Clinton: (chuckle) “ It depends on who’s smiling.”
Al Gore to W: “ See that smiley face slithering down the table-top like Dali’s melting watch? Tell me that’s not the effect of global warming.” W: “Heck of a story Aley boy, but you know that it was caused by Iraqi ‘new-cue-lar’ [sic] WMD.”
Will Rogers: “Ownership makes no never mind, I never met a smile I didn’t like.”
Jesse Jackson: “ Whoa, whoa, this is not legal until the rainbow smiley face is represented”
Martin Luther King Jr.: ” I dreamed you judged smiley by the content of his circle rather that the context of his ink color or origin.”
Pat Robertson: “ Smileys are much too happy and self-absorbed. They must be gay.”
Rush Limbaugh: “I hold here, in my formerly nicotine stained fingers (sound of paper rattling ), and with half my brain tied behind my back, the report by the pinko drive by media admitting that John Kerry and the Democrats leaked the smiley face to the French.”
Al Franken: “ Rush Limbaugh is a big half brained idiot who puts on a smiley face every time he takes a blue pill.”
Bill O’Reilly: “ I’ll give you the last word to opine about the other big ‘O’ as long as the pithiness does not spin here. And check my web site to see what’s for sale.”
Bruce Springsteen: “Smiley was born in the U.S.A/ was born in the U.S.A./ they put a pencil in my hand/ sent me off to a foreign land/ to go and draw the yellow brand.”
50 Cent: “Yo Bro/ Smiley face/ no one ‘gonna take your place/ Wal-Mart ‘gotcha ina store/ Frenchie never get no more.”
Paris Hilton: “Smiley who?”
6/28/06
TOP TIPS TO TIPPERS
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
It is not a question that Jesse James might have asked but some may regard it as such.
“Question: How do you respond to the server who, when picking up the money for your meal, asks ‘Do you want your change?’ Saying this before he/she even looks at the sum you have put on the table.” This was posed to me in an e-mail from a reader of the last column wherein I vented a few peeves on experiences dining out.
My response to him was --I think this is extremely presumptuous and tacky to ask, even though they may be trying to save a return trip to your table with the change. I would probably say "Yes, I want the change." You, and not they, determine how much, or even if, you want to leave a tip. A better way for them to get the point across and be diplomatic at the same time would be for them to say " I'll be right back with your change." To which you may respond "OK" or "Keep it."
Being no Mr. Manners on the finer points of tipping etiquette I did a little research on the subject and found that most diners said “Yes” but left a smaller tip than originally planned.
Thus inspired I continued to dig a little deeper to into the tipping topic.
According to the Internal Revenue Service tipping accounted for $26 billion, which they feel is also underreported. That’s a big chunk of change.
Many think that TIP is an acronym for “To Insure Promptness” but acronyms first appeared about 1920. The word “tip” however was used in the 17th century and was used as a verb by thieves to mean "hand it over" or "to give.". A common practice for feudal lords was throwing gold coins as "tips" to the peasants in the street as a sort of bribery for obtaining safe passage (somehow reminds me of today taxis and skycaps).
The history then is ambiguous but what is certain is that people pay additional money for a service for which they've already paid, this done with no prior agreement as to the amount.
Another question arises, does one tip on the sub-total or the sub-total plus the tax? Most, it seems, pay on the total and thereby are tipping on the tax.
15% is the most common amount followed closely by 20%. Some countries frown on the practice, New Zealand, Iceland, Thailand, China, Japan (considered insulting), and Argentina (officially illegal), to name a few.
In Europe tipping varies widely by country, but check the menu to see if service is included. If it isn't, a tip of 5–10 percent is normal .
In a study by Cornell University and the University of Houston found “ Good service and prompt attention do little to guarantee a big tip from restaurant-goers” . It goes on to say, “The findings show that bill size is the single largest predictor of tip size”Yet in a report by Michael Lynn, associate professor of consumer behavior at Cornell University's School of Hotel Administration, and considered “the world's foremost expert on tipping“, he notes several proven ways for the wait staff to inveigle higher tips.
Among them are: touching the customer on the shoulder or arm, squatting to your eye level while taking your order, introducing themselves by name, wearing unusual ornaments or items of clothing, repeating orders back to customers, a big smile and calling customers by name (obtained from your credit card), forecasting good weather, writing “thank you” and their name and a smiley face on the bill, presenting the bill on a tip tray rather than on the table, and a candy along with your bill are all means to a bigger tip.
It seems a happy diner is a more generous one so the more rapport with the guest whose mood is elevated is in direct proportion with the tip size, and size matters.
How about -- tip jars. Most people hate them but they show up from coffee houses to car washes. The etiquette mavens say “No” to any food-service business that does not bring the food to your table and keep your drinks refilled. The same goes for buffet-lines or cafeterias except if there is a person who efficiently clears used plates and keeps your glass full, then a tip of $1-2 given personally is appropriate.
An exception to the tip jar is the car wash where it is split among the workers.
A waiter explained about tipping in restaurants: “Ten percent of your bill – that’s a tip. But 20 percent – ah, 20 percent is a gratuity!”
You can partake in an unscientific poll: What’s your response and reaction when asked “Do you want your change?”.
TOP TIPS TO TIPPERS
Tri-O's oddities, observations, and opinions
by Herb Kandel
It is not a question that Jesse James might have asked but some may regard it as such.
“Question: How do you respond to the server who, when picking up the money for your meal, asks ‘Do you want your change?’ Saying this before he/she even looks at the sum you have put on the table.” This was posed to me in an e-mail from a reader of the last column wherein I vented a few peeves on experiences dining out.
My response to him was --I think this is extremely presumptuous and tacky to ask, even though they may be trying to save a return trip to your table with the change. I would probably say "Yes, I want the change." You, and not they, determine how much, or even if, you want to leave a tip. A better way for them to get the point across and be diplomatic at the same time would be for them to say " I'll be right back with your change." To which you may respond "OK" or "Keep it."
Being no Mr. Manners on the finer points of tipping etiquette I did a little research on the subject and found that most diners said “Yes” but left a smaller tip than originally planned.
Thus inspired I continued to dig a little deeper to into the tipping topic.
According to the Internal Revenue Service tipping accounted for $26 billion, which they feel is also underreported. That’s a big chunk of change.
Many think that TIP is an acronym for “To Insure Promptness” but acronyms first appeared about 1920. The word “tip” however was used in the 17th century and was used as a verb by thieves to mean "hand it over" or "to give.". A common practice for feudal lords was throwing gold coins as "tips" to the peasants in the street as a sort of bribery for obtaining safe passage (somehow reminds me of today taxis and skycaps).
The history then is ambiguous but what is certain is that people pay additional money for a service for which they've already paid, this done with no prior agreement as to the amount.
Another question arises, does one tip on the sub-total or the sub-total plus the tax? Most, it seems, pay on the total and thereby are tipping on the tax.
15% is the most common amount followed closely by 20%. Some countries frown on the practice, New Zealand, Iceland, Thailand, China, Japan (considered insulting), and Argentina (officially illegal), to name a few.
In Europe tipping varies widely by country, but check the menu to see if service is included. If it isn't, a tip of 5–10 percent is normal .
In a study by Cornell University and the University of Houston found “ Good service and prompt attention do little to guarantee a big tip from restaurant-goers” . It goes on to say, “The findings show that bill size is the single largest predictor of tip size”Yet in a report by Michael Lynn, associate professor of consumer behavior at Cornell University's School of Hotel Administration, and considered “the world's foremost expert on tipping“, he notes several proven ways for the wait staff to inveigle higher tips.
Among them are: touching the customer on the shoulder or arm, squatting to your eye level while taking your order, introducing themselves by name, wearing unusual ornaments or items of clothing, repeating orders back to customers, a big smile and calling customers by name (obtained from your credit card), forecasting good weather, writing “thank you” and their name and a smiley face on the bill, presenting the bill on a tip tray rather than on the table, and a candy along with your bill are all means to a bigger tip.
It seems a happy diner is a more generous one so the more rapport with the guest whose mood is elevated is in direct proportion with the tip size, and size matters.
How about -- tip jars. Most people hate them but they show up from coffee houses to car washes. The etiquette mavens say “No” to any food-service business that does not bring the food to your table and keep your drinks refilled. The same goes for buffet-lines or cafeterias except if there is a person who efficiently clears used plates and keeps your glass full, then a tip of $1-2 given personally is appropriate.
An exception to the tip jar is the car wash where it is split among the workers.
A waiter explained about tipping in restaurants: “Ten percent of your bill – that’s a tip. But 20 percent – ah, 20 percent is a gratuity!”
You can partake in an unscientific poll: What’s your response and reaction when asked “Do you want your change?”.
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